“The Rebels took my keys for the night. Or sent someone to do their dirty work.”
The other person on the phone rumbled out a grumpy laugh, and it echoed along the stone walls. He must have been on speaker. “Do they not assume you have a spare? They truly do think you’re a fucking idiot, don’t they?”
Bain snorted. “I’m sure they searched high and low for the spare. Little did they know, it’s in the fucking electrical box at the warehouse.” He laughed menacingly before sighing. “It doesn’t matter. It’s not like I’m leaving tonight anyway. Who’s doing the run tonight?”
I left the conversation shortly after, feeling my heart thrash inside from the eavesdropping. It was like listening to Richard on the phone inside his office all over again. The fear of being caught made every nerve in my body fizzle out every single time.
After glancing back behind me a thousand times, sweat lining my hairline, I watched as St. Mary’s disappeared in the distance, and I retraced the same route that Isaiah and I had taken. I
t wasn’t difficult to find the warehouse, as there wasn't much more around St. Mary’s other than long winding roads and a few streetlights here and there for good measure. My breath fanned out in front of my face from the chill in the air, and my pace picked up when I eventually saw the rickety metal shack up above. The closer I got to it, the more my blood raced. Adrenaline filled me up as I breathed heavily. I kept pushing Isaiah out of my head, knowing he would be upset with me if he knew what I was doing, and there was a little bit of shame and guilt that came with that, but my curiosity was coming in like rolling thunder. The Covenant Psychiatric Hospital. I had to know. I had to know why it was so familiar. I needed to know why the hospital was so clear inside my memories that I’d managed to draw it before Isaiah even took me there.
There was nothing on the website that made me think twice, but each and every time I saw that drawing, something pulled at my chest. Something urgent. And there was a nagging thought in the back of my head that said, What if Tobias was there? What if it was some weird twin telepathy thing going on?
I sighed, pushing my hair away from my face. There was only one way to find out, and I knew that Isaiah wouldn’t take me with him again. It was too dangerous last time, and he regretted taking me in the first place. And I wasn’t going to bring him with me or ask him to take me back. Not only would that open up a lot of questions that I wasn’t ready to answer yet, but Isaiah had more on the line than I thought.
I wouldn’t put him in a position that could extradite him to expulsion. If the SMC somehow found out that I’d snuck out, then that was on me. But if Isaiah was with me, and we were caught off school grounds, not tutoring like we were supposed to be? He’d be done for. Expelled just like that. And I didn’t want him to cover for me, and I had a big feeling that he would try to.
And if I were being honest, being on my own, making choices for myself—even if I was breaking the rules—felt empowering. Like I was climbing the ladder that I’d been forced to hold for someone else all my life, finally reaching that top rung. Good girls who listen to others and follow all the rules never rise to the top, so I was done being good. I was done being forced to the bottom and doing what I was supposed to do for someone else’s benefit.
I needed answers, and I was going to find them one way or another.
The second my hand landed on Bain’s spare keys shoved inside the electric box off to the side of the warehouse door—just like he’d said—I was filled with intoxicating pride.
I was doing this.
I slid inside Bain’s car with my heart pumping blood to every inch of my body so viciously that my skin singed with anticipation. I really hoped that Isaiah’s little driving lesson was enough for me to get to the Covenant Psychiatric Hospital and back without wrecking into any stone walls like last time.
The car came to life as I turned the key and pressed my shaky foot on the brake. I took my time figuring out the seat, wiggling my fingers over the steering wheel, and looking in the rearview mirror every three seconds, hoping to God Bain’s beady eyes didn’t pop up in full rage that I was taking his car for a spin, but no one appeared.
It was just me and the open road.
After a few seconds of pushing my foot on the accelerator and jerking the brake once or twice, I was on my way.
I followed the directions I’d written down, knowing my phone didn’t work without St. Mary’s Wi-Fi, and before I knew it, the curvy roads and blurred white lines gave way to the looming building, and I was there. My head jolted forward as I slammed on the brakes, and my parking job was completely off, but I’d made it.
The sign was flickering ominously, the P in Psychiatric brighter than the rest, and every once in a while, the only letters that were lit spelled the word Coven, but I had made it. Chills raced over my arms, goosebumps rising as I stepped one foot out of the car. I jumped at the sound of my door slamming, even though I was the one who’d done it. I was on edge, and that was probably a good thing.
That meant I wasn’t stupid enough to walk into a random place and think I would make it back out. If this place meant something to me in my subconscious, it likely wasn’t something good.
Damp leaves smooshed beneath my shoes as I traveled through a small wooded area, careful to keep hidden. It was pitch black outside, and the flickering light of the sign grew dimmer as I rounded the building that I could barely see through the limbs. My breathing was labored, and I could hear my heartbeat in my ears. I stood beside a tree, placing my hand on the rough bark and staring at the small opening that showed the building, and waited for something to happen. Would my subconscious take over and take me back to the time that I’d first seen this building? Would I remember something that I’d suppressed long ago? Would the beating of my heart ever calm enough for me to walk to the side door and peer inside? What exactly was on the other side of that door? Tobias?
The pain I’d constantly pushed down was surfacing. The hole in my heart grew deeper, and the sting of my brother being gone for the last four years was cutting away at me the longer I stood beside the tree. If he was in there, I’d figure out a way to get him back. Just because it was a psychiatric hospital didn’t mean that my brother was mentally ill. He was as sane as ever the last time I’d seen him. Back then, I thought he might have been sick. Or maybe delusional. With everything he was spouting off to me and how he had gripped me tightly by the shoulders and begged me to survive, telling me not believe anything Richard said, was alarming. He had acted erratically, and it had scared me. But now I knew that Tobias was telling the truth. He was right.
Why weren’t any memories coming back to me? I grunted in frustration, anger and annoyance beginning to force my feet forward. I didn’t see anything but the door in front of me, and the closer I got, the more frantic I became. It was a black door with a green awning overhead. My eyes ping-ponged between the two, and when I found myself underneath the tattered green fabric, I found my eyes rising and locking onto it.
This. I remembered this. Only, it wasn’t tattered the first time I’d seen it. And the green wasn’t as faded.
Why have I been here? I clenched my eyes, bringing my hands up and underneath the hood of my black jacket, fisting at my hair. Remember, Gemma!
Just as I started to sort through the dark memories, digging my heels into the hard surface below my feet, I jerked, shooting my eyes open. A hand wrapped around my bicep, and I was swung around violently and thrown up against the door. My head banged off the back of it, and I cried out, fear nearly choking me to death.
I gulped back a scream when I peered up into a man’s face who was glaring down at me with sick pleasure in his dark eyes. “And what is a good girl like you doing in a place like this?”
His grip grew tighter, his fingers pulling the fabric of my jacket. My heart climbed to my throat, and I felt the blood drain from my face. What the hell did I get myself into? The puffs of air were barely making it out of my chest as panic started to surface. The beady look on his face grew with satisfaction as my body began to shake. He smiled, and my stomach fell. “Where is Bain? Huh?” He dipped his face closer to me, and I smelled the cigar scent lingering on his tongue. Just like Richard. “Where is he, you stupid little bitch?” His arm rose quickly, and before I could duck, the back of his hand landed on my cheek, and I cried out in pain. I blinked a few times, trying to steady my vision, but the trees in front of me swayed even more. “Did he send you to make the sales?”
“What?” The word came out slowly, and I tried to snap myself out of the lull I was in. My head pounded. The throbbing was there at my temples, making me wince, but I dug down as deep as I possibly could and stared at one thing in front of me, steadying my gaze. You’ve been in worse places, Gemma. You are strong. I swallowed as his lip snarled. “Bain isn’t with me. I came here on my own.”
Regret began to poke at the thick wall I shot up from the second I made the decision to come here. I shouldn’t have. It was a mistake. It was apparent that I hadn’t learned my lesson wi