“I’m…” I stepped forward just as Isaiah’s eyes swung to mine. His head was low, and his vulnerability pulled at the strings inside my chest. “I’m so sorry.”
“You are the last person who should say sorry. You’re helping me with my probation. You’re helping me keep Jack safe, in a way.”
Part of me wanted to tell him to forget about our deal. That he didn’t have to give me money or a fake ID. I didn’t want anything in return if it meant helping him. It was as if I was seeing Isaiah Underwood, St. Mary’s bad boy, for the first time. I saw him in a different way now. I saw his vulnerabilities, and to me, that meant everything. It made him real.
Of course I didn’t tell him not to pay me or give me what he promised, because that would be insane given all that I had on the line too, but I wanted to. I wanted him to know that I wasn’t only in this because of our deal but that I would help him with anything.
St. Mary’s had it all wrong. Isaiah wasn’t this almighty, arrogant, ruler-of-the-school bad boy.
No.
Isaiah was good. And protective. And loyal.
Chapter Forty-Six
Gemma
Isaiah and I had been standing silently in the empty forest for entirely too long. Goosebumps continued to rise over my flesh as I wracked my head for something to say to him. For something other than the annoying and unneeded apology that kept trying to escape my mouth.
I knew I had nothing to say sorry for. That whatever else laid behind those icy depths of his wasn’t my fault and likely had nothing to do with me, but I was still sorry. I was sorry that he was in a constant battle between keeping his brother safe and losing sight of himself. That had to have weighed heavily on him. It had to. Just like it weighed on me that I was in a constant battle of getting as far away from Richard as possible or getting close enough to him to find out where Tobias was. One made me feel selfish, but the other was like signing my own death certificate.
“Do you want to go back up to the bonfire?”
Moving my attention from the twigs and leaves underneath my shoes, I found Isaiah standing only a few feet away from me. His brows were raised to his hairline as he waited for my answer, and I found myself shaking my head no.
There was a glint of gloss on Isaiah’s bottom lip, like he’d recently licked it, and I felt myself pushing my back further into the tree that I was leaning on.
“Well, then what do you want to do? Go back up to the school? Go to the library to pretend we’re studying, even when we both know that’s total bullshit? Take my uncle’s car for a test drive?” He waggled his eyebrows. “I can teach you how to drive.”
An abrupt laugh flew out of my mouth. “Absolutely not.”
His lip curved until we both snapped to the left as a branch broke. The rustling of leaves quickly followed, and my heart flew up to my throat. The options were honestly endless as to what could have made such noises in the middle of the night, trapped inside a dark forest.
Isaiah was in front of me so quickly that I didn’t even have time to register the fact that he’d moved. His body covered mine as his hand clamped over my mouth. I breathed in and out of my nose, smelling pine and his earthy cologne, as fear crowded my thoughts, and shadows began to dance in the distance. Isaiah’s forehead slowly fell to mine as he whispered, “Relax. It’s probably nothing.”
Relax? It could be a bear! Or…or someone from the SMC wondering what he and I were doing sneaking away from the bonfire! Or...or Bain! Not that I would be too concerned if Bain showed up. I knew that I was safe with Isaiah. He wouldn’t let anything happen to me.
Another twig snapped in the other direction, and we both turned our heads to see if anything appeared. I glanced up to the stars and moon again as it acted as a spotlight over our bodies, and Isaiah nodded, catching what I was saying. He dropped his hand from my mouth and intertwined our fingers before pulling me a little farther into the forest. We walked slowly so we didn’t make too much noise and then nestled in between two more trees
that had better coverage. Our hands stayed joined together as my pulse drummed behind my skin. I tried to shake off the unease slithering over my shoulder as I was quickly reminded of the last time I was running through a wooded area. I could almost feel the sharp stabbings of twigs puncturing my legs as I ran as fast I could from Richard.
“Gemma, relax.” Isaiah squeezed my hand a few times as I took a deep breath through my nose. “There’s nothing to be afraid of. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
I squeezed his hand back, feeling a slight flutter in my belly. “I know that. I’m not afraid.”
He pulled me in a little closer to him, our bodies colliding. “Are you sure about that? You’re breathing like…” A quiet chuckle left his rumbling chest. “Never mind.”
I felt myself relax against him until we heard some more rustling. Isaiah’s hands cupped my waist as he looked over my head, and I peeked around. My brows crowded as I watched something move, and then came a loud smack and a giggle. Who was that?
“Fucking Shiner,” Isaiah mumbled, flipping me around so my back was pressed to his front as we faced the noises. Isaiah’s warmth grew closer as his breath floated over my ear. “Shiner’s known for bringing girls out here during the bonfires. I should’ve known.”
And as if on cue, Shiner said, “You like that, baby? I’ve always heard you like it a little dirty.”
My eyes widened as Isaiah began shaking behind me with laughter. Certainly they couldn’t be doing stuff…out here? Right?
“What…” My eyes squinted as I watched through the swaying grass and tree limbs as two dark shadows moved languidly with one another. “What are they…wait. Are they...?”
The taller shadow, who I assumed was Shiner, put his hands on the smaller shadow's shoulders and pushed her down below his waist. My brow furrowed even more as I took in her moving figure and the noises that came with it. It sounded like a hiss of an animal followed by Shiner mumbling, “Fuck yes.” His head tipped back, showing off his long neck and the side of his straight nose. When I scanned my eyes down to where the girl was, my breathing quickened even more than before. The movement of her head in between the small openings of the branches had my cheeks flushing so quickly I felt the burn.