Sawyer spun around and glared. “of course he’s no burden. you don’t know how it is for kids like him. They’ve been kicked in the teeth and emotionally tortured. I never want him to believe he’s trapped or owes me to stay. If I keep it light, he won’t feel any pressure. I just want him to be safe. Try to protect him.”
Another layer peeled off before her. Julietta stared at the man who was about to become her husband and wondered if she’d ever be safe from him. His sexual appeal was magnetic but something she could fight. His determination to protect Wolfe snuck past every defense. He loved Wolfe, but he didn’t know how to communicate or deal with it.
Julietta realized he didn’t know how to care about another person in a permanent way. His past told him commitments ended in pain. God knows what he’d gone through, but she had to show him a different path. Prove in some way that there was so much more for him if he only opened up.
Sawyer deserved it. Wolfe deserved it.
She fought the need to hold him and stood still. “I’m not going to pretend to have the same kind of background, to experience the type of pain you both went through. But I do know he’s a nineteen-year-old kid who needs something he can cling to. Something solid. He needs you, Sawyer.”
He jerked as if slapped. “I’m doing the best I can,” he growled. “Jesus, why are you pushing him? If he wants his own space, I can’t blame him. He can’t be forced into an uncomfortable situation.”
Sensing she neared a dangerous precipice, Julietta listened to her gut and pushed. Her heels snapped as she closed the distance and stood before him. Chin up, she got in his face and challenged him. “He needs the exact op-posite right now. Giving him space means you don’t give a shit about him. Letting him work things out in his own time translates that you don’t want to be bothered. Are you that much of a coward? Do you only want to do half of the work to help him and then scurry away because it gets too messy?
you got him off the street and gave him a job. But the moment emotion is involved, you freeze up and deny it’s even there. or is that something you just want to accuse me of?”
Stunned recognition filled tiger gold eyes. Something seemed to break inside him, a memory that drove him to lose control and slip into the wild, animalistic persona always shimmering beyond his surface. He gritted his teeth.
“you think a hug and heart-to-heart chat can fix what’s wrong with us? We’re way past that, baby. It’s a f**king miracle he doesn’t jump anymore when someone touches him, let alone share some fun memories. How about the nights spent on the street in freezing temperatures under dirty newspapers and smelling like shit? Fighting over a half-eaten hot dog in the garbage? Watching a kid get the shit beaten out of him and not lifting a finger to help?” The darkness rose up and claimed him. His body shuddered and she knew it wasn’t about Wolfe any longer, but his own dreadful past rearing up. “Whenever I tried to protect someone, I made it worse. I learned to step back and not get involved, because it was safer for everyone.”
“Not now,” she said firmly. Julietta grabbed his hands and squeezed. He stared at her with eyes half focused.
“That was before, because you needed to survive. Now you need to live, Sawyer, and so does Wolfe. you need to give him more of yourself even though you’re scared. Wolfe has a chance because you got to him in time. Do you under-stand?”
“What if I make it worse? I don’t want him to . . . leave.”
Her heart shattered, and she stepped into his arms.
Laying her head on his chest, she buried herself deep in his warmth and bled for the little boy who never had anyone to help him. He responded to the embrace and hugged her back hard and clung. “He doesn’t want to leave you,” she whispered. “He just needs to know you’ll fight for him. That you care enough and that he’s not a charity project you pick up and play with.”
Silence fell between them. Julietta stayed in his arms for a long time and let her words sink in. When his heart stopped hammering, and his grip relaxed, she eased out of the embrace. His gaze probed her face, searching for something she was terrified of. “Why do you care so much?” he asked.
She took a shaky breath. “Because I see him in you.”
Julietta turned and took a few steps back. Waited for him to grab her and challenge the statement. Push her to cop to the emotion like he did all those hours in the bedroom, wringing out every honest response her physical and emotional body hid from him. But he said nothing. Disappointment flooded her, but she told herself it was a good thing. Better to keep the relationship on neutral ground or they might destroy each other. “We’d better go. I have a meeting at noon.”
He followed her out in silence.
…
Sawyer rapped on the door and tried to ignore his sweaty palms. Un-fucking-believable. He’d gotten dragged into pa-rental hell without the benefit of any previous experience.
But Julietta was right. Time to grow some balls and take control of this situation.
The kid opened the door. “I’ll take one of those meat-ball subs.”
Sawyer snorted. “I’m not here to take your dinner order, smart-ass. I have leftovers from yesterday we can heat up.”
“Cool. What’s up?”
Wolfe wore one of his usual long-sleeved cotton shirts, a pair of jeans, and white sport socks. His headset fell around his neck, and the echo of some loud type of rock music pinged in the air. The crazy spikes of his hair were damp and soft, falling into thick curls that told Sawyer the kid had once had a nice set of locks before he decided to torture them. “I wanted to talk for a minute.”
A wall dropped between them. The easy manner disappeared, and a gleam of resolution pierced through tur-quoise eyes. “Sure. Umm, listen, I was gonna say this to you later, but I figured you had a lot going on with the wedding.
I’m heading out.”
Sawyer moved into the room, causing Wolfe to back up. Dread settled in his stomach, but he kept his tone light.
“Heading out where?”
Wolfe shifted his feet. “you’re getting hitched, and I’ve got itchy feet. Figure I’ll help you finish out this deal and move on. Maybe back to New york.”
“you don’t like working for me anymore?”
“No, I like it. Let’s be honest, man. We never spoke long-term arrangements here. I’ve been saving my money for a while, and I think I can support myself now. After all, you paid me a great salary. you’ve helped me a lot, and it’s time to get on with your life. Do you think you could give me a recommendation? If you want to, of course.”