The raw honesty shuddered through her. She lifted her head and cupped his cheek. “I know he left after you were born. I know he was Swiss, very rich, and swept your mother off her feet in an old-fashioned romance. But you never elaborated on your relationship . . . if you ever found him or had contact.”
Carina knew she danced the line. Expected him to withdraw into his safe haven and give her a flip answer. He always avoided speaking about his past, and her mother and Michael never mentioned it, though Max had been part of their family.
He gave her the second gift of the evening.
“I was twenty-one when I finally decided to track him down. All that time I just waited for something to happen. A card. Present. Note. I finally realized he was never going to contact me, so I decided to do it myself. A rich Swiss businessman who completely disappeared seemed odd. I always wondered if he’d been involved in some scandal and wanted to protect me. I even thought he was dead.”
Her heart shattered at his flat tone. She wrapped her arms around him for body warmth and listened.
“I found him in London. He ended up just an old drunk who didn’t give a shit. No exotic past or legitimate excuses.”
“Did you ever speak with him?”
“Yes. He knew who I was when I saw him in the bar. And he didn’t care. Never wanted me as a baby, and didn’t give a shit that I grew up. He gave me money. He thought that should be enough.” Carina wondered what it felt like to have your own blood deny you any part of their heritage or memories. No wonder he isolated himself so much. No wonder he never wanted to take a chance on anything permanent. “But I was finally able to let it go. I was tired of living my life for a ghost that never really was. I left London the next day and never looked back.”
They both knew it was a lie. Everyone looked back. But for now, she allowed him the space.
“I think your mom forgave him. I think your mom still even loves him in some way.”
He craned his neck and looked down at her. “No. Mama never mentions him. Why would you think that?”
She reached up and tangled her fingers in his hair. “Because he gave her you. And you were worth everything, Maximus Gray.”
Something flashed in his eyes—an emotion she never spotted before. A tenderness that spread over her like honey and melted every part of her body.
She pressed her mouth to his. With a low groan, he slid his tongue inside and thrust deep. She linked her ankle over his calf and shifted her weight. He stirred to life.
“Damn, one day you’re going to make someone a great husband.” The words popped out of her mouth and she cursed. “Ah, crap, you know what I mean. Don’t get your ego in a tangle. This is just about sex.”
“Thanks for reminding me of my use and purpose.” Her fingers drifted, wrapping around his penis and playing. He groaned and allowed her free access, until his erection throbbed in her hand and power pumped through her veins. “Baby, you’re killing me.”
She slid down his body, straddled him, and lowered her mouth. Then smiled. “Not yet, but I will.”
She took him fully in and closed her lips around his shaft. The scent and flavor of him urged her on, and she spent long minutes enjoying giving him pleasure. Harsh expletives shot from his mouth and made her even hotter. He reared up and grabbed her before she could protest. “Condom,” he hissed out. “Now.”
Carina fumbled but got it on in seconds. With one quick motion, he lifted her up and over.
He filled her and pushed every other thought out of her mind but how she could take more of him. Tilting her hips, she set the motion, until he couldn’t wait any longer and took control. She rode him in a furious frenzy until they both came apart together. She slumped over him in a big melty pool of satisfaction and wondered if she’d ever walk again. Or do anything again without thinking about Maximus Gray.
“Where the hell did you learn to do that?”
She tamped down a giggle at the cranky tone, though his body seemed happily satisfied. “I can’t. It’s too embarrassing.”
“We’re on orgasm number ten. We’re past embarrassing.”
“A banana.”
Instead of laughing, he waggled a brow. “Damn, that’s hot.”
Carina laughed with delight and realized she may just still be almost in love with Max.
Almost.
She bit down on the sudden surge of emotion. No, she’d never admit or express such words again, not since that night she’d burned the love spell and dreamed of marrying the man she loved with her heart and mind and soul.
Instead, she said nothing. Just kissed his face and held him close. And waited for dawn.
Chapter Eleven
He’d left the blinds open.
The weak light of morning pierced through and reminded him the night was officially over. He glanced over at the woman beside him. She slept deeply, her cute little snores confirming her exhaustion. What the hell was he going to do?
Leave her a note? Bring her coffee? Discuss the night? Remain silent? The endless options stretched before him and as a man, he was already guaranteed to pick the wrong one.
Her rich hair spread out on the pillow like a dark angel, and he spotted the telltale signs of stubble burn over her cheeks and neck. Her lips looked puffy and bruised. A sliver of guilt pierced through him. Had he used her too hard and too well? He never thought of her as a virgin. Every motion confirmed her open, raw sexuality. She was a wet dream come true—a purist with the body and soul of a seductress. In bed she exhibited a naked truth that confirmed she gave all of herself. Just like in her life.
Such a priceless, rare gift. One he wasn’t worthy of. One he’d never ask her to give to him again.
An empty grief roared through him but he refused to examine the emotion. Maybe he’d shower, get dressed, and bring her coffee. He’d confirm how much she meant to him; how much the endless hours of making love changed him forever. Then explain once again why they needed to end it.
Unless . . .
The possibility swarmed before him. What if they continued the relationship? Carina in his bed. Taking her to dinner. Seducing her out of that proper business suit. Working side by side. Maybe it could work. Maybe . . .
Michael Conte and his family inspired him to make the most out of himself. When his father walked, Max needed to build something he could count on. His word. His honor. His trust. This meant everything to him, and defined who he was as a man. If Michael discovered he’d slept with Carina, he may never get that trust back, and it could break him.