Chapter TWENTY-FIVE ~ The End Result
Weeks pass by and Dantedidn’t dare to show his face. I was angry and bitter, but the pain of not having him near was even worse. Eating away at me every day as I wonder where he is and if I actually meant that much to him.
He hadn’t even tried to reach out, and I was unsure how I felt about it. A mix of relief, he listened, but a slap in the face that he hadn’t at least tried. Dante was a man who kept his word, and if he vowed to stay away, then he would. But I wasn’t sure if I wanted that, and the wounds of what he had done were still very raw. The lie that he kept from me still ran deep and stung to my very core. But the love that I felt for him never went away and I’m left heartbroken all over again.
I carried on with my life and kept the shop going. Not holding myself in my own self-pity and letting it consume me. Not this time.
This time I’m just holding my head above water and trying to take it day by day. But I can’t stop thinking about him and everything around here reminds me of him. I look at a rose and see his gorgeous face lost in lust for me as he touches my skin with it. I work and plan, but only see his magnificent body naked before me. Distracting me to no end and turning me on.
I go to my kitchen for a cup of coffee and it reminds me of him. His gorgeous deep brown eyes staring at me over top of the rim. But it’s when I go to bed, cold and alone, I see him the most. Remembering his body heat next to mine. The caress of his flesh, his passionate kisses and his heartbeat beating only for me.
I wish so much that things could’ve been different and he would’ve just told me the truth. The truth about why he had come back to Dawson and back into my life again. It would’ve still hurt, but at least the truth would be out. The grief would consume me, but I could get through it.
But the lies are harder to get past and I don’t know where to go from here. My heart aches for him, but my mind still reels with anger. I’m furious with him, but still wish I could see his handsome face. But I’m the one who told him to go. I’m the one who told him to leave. And he’s listening, but deep down I don’t want him to. Deep down I want him to come back because I miss him and the shop did great with him here. Things were still running smoothly in his absence, but my heart longs for him to be here. Everything was moving along without him until I couldn’t get out of bed one morning. The nausea was so great I couldn’t bear to move and only made it to the bathroom to throw up all the food contents from the day before. My head spun and my world was weak. I felt like I had come down with something and was in no shape to run the store.
I’ve been in bed for an entire week, and Lexi has been in charge once again. But this time it was different. This time I wanted to be out there, but I just physically couldn’t. I would not let grief hold me back, but this sickness sure was. And it’s just for the time being.
Lexi will hold everything together, and she’s also taking care of me. Preparing my meals that I can’t keep down, cleaning up when I can’t and making sure I’m comfortable. My best friend is my life line right now and I’m always incredibly grateful to her.
“Oh, no, not again...” I mumbled as I leaped out of bed and made it to the bathroom.
I leaned over the toilet bowl with the lid already raised from my last throw up and spilled a bit of food contents into the water below. My stomach's relieved, but still continued to grumble inside for more.
I want to eat, but the smell of food even makes me queasy. Causing me to feel unwell with no temperature and weak on my feet. A repetitive cycle that doesn’t want to end and I’m getting sick of it.
I cleaned up my face by splashing water on it and patting it dry with a towel. Collecting myself once again as I drag my feet towards my bed and slump back down on top of it. Wanting to eat, but sick of this terrible cycle.
“I think it’s time you take this.” Lexi announced as she heard the commotion and came to see me. She held a pregnancy test in her hand and has been urging me to take it for days. “It could be one way to know for sure what’s been going on with you lately. I’m getting really worried about you. You’re not sleeping right, can’t stay on your feet for too long and you can’t keep anything down.”
“I know you’re worried, but I can’t be pregnant.” I sighed with frustration at the conversation and hugged my pillow close. “I’m on the pill, remember?”
“Well, I know that, silly...” Lexi groaned as she took a seat on the edge of my bed and laid the test in front of me. “But those can fail.”
“Well, mine never has, and why would it be any different this time?” I mumbled as I grabbed the test and read the instructions on the back of the box.
“I really don’t know, but you won’t know for sure until you try.” Lexi urged me as I rolled my eyes at her and pointed the box at her.
“I will do it just this once.” I said and stood from the bed. “But I’m telling you I’m not pregnant and there’s no way I could be.”
I made my way back into the bathroom and held the walls for support. Lexi offered to help, but I refused. She’s done more than enough for me, and I wanted to do this on my own.
She gave me a slight smile as I closed the door and heard her rest her body right against it. “You better tell me exactly what’s going on.”
“Do I have much of a choice?” I groaned with displeasure at the event and opened the damn box. I pulled the test out of its plastic package and pulled down my pants. “I’m going to pee on the stick now.”
“Oh, I can’t wait to hear what it says!” Lexi exclaimed from behind the door.
I sat on the toilet and let it flow. The hot tingle meets cold skin as the pee comes out and lands straight on the stick. Pulling it out as I finish, and laying the test on top of the bathroom counter. Starting the timer on my cell phone for three minutes and waiting for the result.
One that I couldn’t believe was possible because my birth control always worked like a charm. It will come back negative and I have nothing to worry about. I just have the flu and it will pass with time like everything else does.
“What’s going on in there? Did you pee yet?” Lexi asked with desperation in her voice.
“Yes, I did. Would you calm down? Time’s almost up and nothing has happened yet.” I explained with a giggle and smiled at her excitement. “It’s going to be negative and I have nothing...”
My smile turned into an immediate frown, and my words failed me. I watched that tiny test change my life in a matter of minutes as two bright pink lines appeared on the test and my heart sank. I stared at it with shock as I went closer and picked it up. My eyes wide with disbelief at the obvious result that I’m indeed pregnant and this is more than unexpected.
It’s life changing.
Suddenly, Lexi banged on the door, and I jumped in response. “What the hell is going on in there? It’s got to be over three minutes!”
I reached for the doorknob with the positive pregnancy test in my trembling grasp and pulled the door open. Lexi’s eyes met mine, but found the positive test result in my hand. She stared at it with wide eyes as she looked from me towards the test and I couldn’t speak a word. This result has caught me completely off guard and I had no idea what I’m going to do about it. “It’s true. You are pregnant with Dante’s baby.”
And that’s when my world fell into darkness.
The End