“No,” I say a little too quickly.
“Okay, if you don’t want to talk about that, can we talk about the hottie in the Wranglers?”
“Ugh.” I flop against the high back of the upholstered wing chair. This restaurant is eclectic to say the least. Mismatched chairs at each table. Antique chandeliers throughout. Floral wallpaper meets striped wallpaper, meets polka dot wallpaper. It makes me feel like I’m having a tea party at the Mad Hatter’s place. Except with mimosas. “We’re...I don’t know what we are. He marched into my office the day I got fired.”
Drink.
“Because you were ignoring all his calls and texts?”
“Yeah.”
Drink.
“What did he say?”
Drink. I swipe my fingers across my lips and glance out the big windows at the sunny downtown street, thinking of how it felt to have Rhett touch my lips.
“That he loves me.”
“Well, shit.” Willa flops back in her chair too. “What did you say to that?”
I worry my bottom lip between my teeth. “I asked him how his ribs felt. I didn’t know what to say. I had really dug in on being angry with him, so it took me by surprise. He said I was his priority. That he was always going to keep coming back.”
Willa sighs wistfully. “So fucking romantic.”
“Sure, and then he told me he was still going to ride in the finals, and I don’t know what to make of that.”
“What do you mean?”
Drink. Sigh. Look back at my best friend. “I mean, I don’t want to be the girl who tells someone to stop doing something they love. Everyone tells him to stop. Do you know his family doesn’t even come to watch him when the events are close? He’s there alone. And I hate that for him.”
I sigh again, thinking about how much that bothers me. All his close family, but still so alone.
“Between his shoulder and his rib injuries, he’s injured enough that he won’t be able to ride like he normally does. Not safely. I know it. He knows it. He knows it could end poorly—so damn poorly.” Ire creeps into my voice. “And he’s going to go out there and do it anyway. He’ll leave me in the aftermath if something terrible happens. I’ve already picked up the pieces of so much heavy shit in my life. I’m not sure I want to sign up for caring about someone more than they care about themselves.”
My friend sips elegantly while humming thoughtfully. I can see the wheels turning in her head as she mulls over my rant. “Maybe he doesn’t know what making you a priority looks like because no one has ever made him a priority.”
My mouth opens, but no sound comes out. I close it again, turning that thought around in my mind. Kip made sure I always knew I was his priority, no matter what else was going on in our lives. Winter, too.
But Rhett...he kind of got lost in the shuffle of life and tragedy and struggling to get by. Does he truly not know what it feels like to be someone’s priority?
“I see I’ve struck you dumb. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. Now tell me, do you love this man?”
My heart rate ratchets up, and I swear I can feel the blood pumping through my veins. I’ve only confessed this to myself. In my head. Saying it out loud makes it feel astonishingly real.
But maybe that’s what Rhett needs from me.
I pull the mimosa up to my lips, throw a hand over my eyes, and mutter, “Yeah,” before chasing back the rest of the drink. They really do serve them in small glasses.
And then I sit with my hand over my face, trying to figure out what that means. I hear Willa call out to a server that we’ll have another round.
“Is she okay?” The guy sounds skeptical because I probably look hammered. I’m not, but two mimosas on an empty stomach isn’t a great recipe for sobriety either.
“Her? Oh, nah. She’s a mess. Get the lady a drink.”
The guy chuckles, and I hear him depart as I continue to hide under the cover of my palm.
I smile, opening my eyes to tell Willa that I don’t think I need another round, but she’s got her head tipped down staring at her phone, thumbs swiping furiously across the screen.