“To a new city.”
“Tired of the winters around here?”
“Something like that.” I look down at my food again, which is now only half of what it was before. I didn’t even notice devouring half the sandwich almost all at once.
“Who is he?”
My head snaps up. Good thing I didn’t have anything in my mouth, or I might be choking right now. “What?”
“The guy you’re hiding from. A boyfriend? Did he hurt you?” His voice gets a little tighter with each word until his teeth are almost clenched.
My skin feels too tight all of a sudden. Did somebody turn up the thermostat? I’m getting sweaty, but I’m so cold inside. “Why are we talking about this?”
“You almost lost it when I came up to you on the street.”
“It’s called being a woman navigating the world.”
He nods. “You didn’t want to sit where we might be seen from outside. And you almost jumped out of your skin a little while ago when something fell in the kitchen. I’m just saying, I’ve seen it with my own two eyes since I was a little kid.” He wipes his mouth with a napkin before balling it up in his fist. “It would’ve been better not to have a dad around.”
Something about it makes me loosen up. It’s like he gets it. “I have to get far away,” I murmur before picking up the rest of the sandwich. “I don’t know where yet. Maybe a small town. Someplace quiet.”
“You want to get lost.”
“Pretty much.”
When he leans in, I’m almost overwhelmed by his energy. “You want me to ruin his life for you?”
I can’t help but laugh. “Yeah, right. You can make him an offer he can’t refuse or something like that.”
He’s not laughing. He hasn’t cracked a grin. My laughter dies, ending on what sounds more like a choking noise. “You’re not serious, are you?”
“Of course not.” I’m not totally convinced. Not even close. But I get the feeling some things are better left unasked, so I won’t bother. We aren’t friends, and we never will be. This is nothing more than an arrangement. No need to ask probing questions.
Although there is one thing I can’t finish this meal without knowing. He might not even tell me the truth, but my curiosity won’t leave me alone. “This arrangement of ours. Is this something you guys do a lot?”
He pulls his chair a little closer, leaning in like he wants to make sure this is private. It’s not like anybody is paying attention—this place is crazy busy, with everybody in a hurry to finish their meals before going back to work or whatever they’re doing. I do appreciate his discretion, though. “They told you we were all clean, right? You don’t have to worry about that.”
“No, that’s not what I was thinking about at all. It’s just that…” Just what? Just that I shouldn’t have asked in the first place? Because now I don’t know how to voice my question. He waits, his face blank. That’s not helping. “I guess I’m wondering how you end up being into what you guys are into. You know what I mean. Sharing.” I do finger quotes around the word, pathetic as it is.
“Oh, you know.” He lifts a thick shoulder. “One night, we were all sitting around and thought, hey, this might be something new.”
“Not really!”
“Not really.” He chuckles before finishing what’s left of his fries. “We’ve known each other half our lives. I couldn’t tell you when it started. One of us probably brought it up one night when we were all wasted and bullshitting. It works for us.”
“No judgment. I was only wondering.” I bite my lip and look down at my plate. “I wish I could be that free to try the things I’m interested in. Maybe I’m a little jealous.”
“There’s plenty of time to explore everything. No rush.” When I pry my eyes away from the plate and dare to look at him, he’s wearing the same expression he was back at the club. His eyes are hooded by half-closed lids, nostrils flaring. His jaw tightens, and I forget to breathe for a second.
If I don’t look away from him, I might never remember to breathe.
“Can I get you anything else?” I didn’t notice our server standing next to the table. Dash’s quick scowl tells me he didn’t, either. Her presence has the effect of a bucket of ice water poured over the table. Whatever weird energy was passing between us fizzles out, which I guess is a good thing, but it doesn’t feel that way right now.
I shake my head, so Dash asks for the check. I guess they can’t have us sitting around wasting space when people are waiting to be seated. If it were up to me, I’d sit here all day. Even the threat of being spotted wouldn’t be enough to move me. This is the first time in too long I’ve hung out with a nice person who wasn’t Thatcher. She was the only one of my friends who stuck by me once Adam started taking control of my life, mostly because she’s too damn stubborn to walk away.
Even if I wasn’t horny for Dash, which I so clearly am, considering the heat simmering in my pussy since we sat down, I would want to sit and talk with him. He has an easygoing, quiet way about him that makes it easy for me to loosen up.
“I guess I’d better get back home,” I muse once we’re on our way out of the restaurant. Now the thought of returning to that sad little motel is like clouds moving across the sun.