“Mazey, I’m not doing this with you so you can distract me from killing R—”
“Don’t say his name. Not right now.”
The anger on Cole’s face began melting away the second the words left my mouth, and as soon as his bedroom door shut, he spun me around and placed his hand at the small of my back as he pulled me into his chest. “I guess it still works, huh?”
“What?” The word was like a soft breath coming from my lips, and all I could do was stare at his. I wanted him to kiss me again. I missed it.
“You were the only one who could climb inside my head and calm me down.”
“Are you calm now?” I asked, feelings of hope crashing and falling as I knew I needed to step away and explain everything to him.
His grip on me tightened, and I was suddenly pressed harder into his front. “If I say yes, does that mean I have to let you go?”
Step away, Mazey. This is not why you’re here. This is Cole…and… I gulped, all thoughts scattering as Cole’s thumb began brushing over my bare skin. “Don’t,” I said, and his fingers stilled. I bit my lip. “I meant…don’t let me go.”
I watched as his pupils dilated, and the room suddenly grew hot. “Mazey…”
I pushed my mouth closer to his, knowing that I was going to regret this in the morning. “I’ve missed you, Cole. Even when I pretended I didn’t.” What was I saying?! My nostrils flared as I kept my tears at bay. Cole’s eyes drove into mine, and I was drowning. I was drowning in his touch, his presence, his smell.
“And you have no fucking idea how much I’ve missed you.” I felt his words. I felt the hurt and regret and anguish with every breath that lingered between us.
A gulp left my throat, and we both stood there for a few moments, unmoving. The thoughts of why we were even in his room in the first place had disappeared, and all I could think about was how being with Cole made my entire world spin. So, I did what I wanted to do and didn’t think twice about it.
I kissed him.
And he kissed me back.
Emotions pulled from my soul and mingled with his, and the only time we parted lips was when he tore his shirt from his back and flung it to the ground. I ran my fingers over his bare skin, feeling it bubble beneath with goosebumps that blanketed mine as well. His hands dove underneath my shirt, and he pulled it up and over my head, glancing down at my bra before clenching his eyes and kissing me harder.
Cole pulled me over to his bed with the bundled-up covers without breaking away, and the second he sat us down, I straddled his lap. His head went to my chest, and he inhaled me like he wanted to stay there forever.
“We shouldn’t do this, Maze,” he whispered, and I froze. “Not under these circumstances. There’s too much shit between us, and I’m trying to do right by you—for the first fucking time in my life.”
A light laugh floated out of me as I ran my fingers down his bare chest. I nearly licked my lips. “It’s funny that you think I’m that same innocent girl I was back in high school, Cole.”
There was a cloud of jealousy that covered him with the small divot in between his eyebrows and the flicking of his jaw as he peered up at me. “What does that mean?” he asked, sliding his hand up my spine.
“It means I want you to touch me, and I’m not going to be shy about it, despite the ugly past that’s hanging over us.”
Cole’s eyes shut, and the intensity that burned within them moved to his fingers as he unhooked my bra and clamped onto the fabric with his teeth. He pulled the thin cotton away from my breasts and let the straps fall slowly down my arms as he watched with bated breath. “Fuck me,” he whispered, cupping me around the waist and putting his hot mouth on my nipple. I threw my head back, allowing the past to disappear and enjoying the moment with his hands on me, even though what I said was true: we had an ugly past. The only problem was that it didn’t seem to matter at the moment.
My panting filled the room, and Cole’s mouth moved to the other breast, and I was throbbing so hard that I wasn’t sure if it was because it had been a few months since I’d had sex, or if it was simply because of him.
“Cole,” I said, gripping his hair tightly.
“Say my name again.” His teeth clamped down gently on my nipple, and I cried out. “I like hearing it on your lips.”
“Cole,” I repeated, not because he asked me to, but because I was a chaotic mess of want and need.
His mouth left me, and his eyes snagged with mine. “Fuck,” he muttered, laying me on my back a half a second later. The button of my jeans was shoved through the hole as Cole pushed me further onto his bed. “I’m going to lose myself in you. Tell me to stop if you need me to, otherwise I’m going to fucking devour every inch of your skin, because goddamn, I feel starved without you.”
A thrill raced down my body, and he caught my half-smile. “There’s my girl,” he whispered, pulling my jeans down my legs quickly. His face disappeared, and his warm breath was at my center next. I gasped, my back arching as his hand came down and covered my panties. “Goddamn, Mazey. It’s better than I remember.”
“Ah,” I moaned as his mouth covered me through the thinness of my panties. “Cole.”
“Keep saying my name like that, and I’ll make you come harder and harder, Mazey.”
When did he start the dirty talk?