HARPER
“You’ve been different lately.What’s going on with you?” My mom’s voice echoes around the bathroom. I put her on speaker when she called at this way-too-early hour, so I can talk to her while getting ready for my appointment. Her tone is gentle, like she’s afraid she’ll spook me. Have I been that bad during our phone calls?
“Sorry, Mom. There’s been a lot of stuff going on in the last few months.”
“I know, sweetie. I feel terrible for not being there for you more.”
“Don’t be.”
With the way she huffs on the other end of the line, I don’t think she’s going to stop there, especially since I know she really does feel bad for being gone so long. But she deserves this. And as much as I miss her, I don’t want her to come back early just because of me.
Distract her with something.
“I’ve met someone.” The confession is a rash decision but one that feels right. I still haven’t told either of my parents about Ryan or the baby, but maybe it’s time. I can’t keep it a secret forever, and feelings will probably get hurt the longer I wait.
After this appointment, I’ll come clean with everyone. I have to. But I have to know first if everything’s all right with my little one.
My mom gasps. “You did?”
“Yes.”
“Just recently?”
“On New Year’s.”
“Oh wow, that was a while ago.” She’s quiet for a moment before she whispers, “Does that mean it’s serious then? Are you in love with him?”
I almost drop my eyebrow pencil into the sink.
“Uh.” I stare at my wide eyes in the mirror.
Am I in love with him?That’s a loaded question.
“You said you met him on New Year’s, right? So that’s what . . . almost three months now?” She keeps going like she didn’t just throw that love bomb at me.
“Yeah, almost.”
“That’s quite some time to get to know someone, especially if you spend a lot of time together.”
“I guess.” My brain’s trying to break through the fog this conversation has caused.
Because isn’t that exactly what I’ve been doing? Getting to know Ryan better? We haven’t seen as much of each other as I’d have liked, but since I went to visit him, we’ve been either texting or talking daily. I can’t remember the last time I’ve talked this much to anyone.
It’s not the first time I’m wondering if this time apart has actually allowed us to get to know each other better than if circumstances had been more traditional. We probably would have talked half as much if we’d been dating normally since we would have spent that time naked together.
At least I don’t need to worry about our physical compatibility since our time together is a testimony to that and our mutual attraction. Just thinking about our physical connection and the way Ryan knows what to do with a woman’s body raises my temperature.
But now I can say it’s the whole package that gets me going. Sure, at the beginning I was incredibly attracted to his looks, but he also turned out to be beyond sweet and caring. It gets me every time he checks on me to make sure I’m okay. Or when he goes on his weekly grocery run to find the fruit that correctly showcases our baby’s current size so he can send me a cheeky selfie with it.
Then there’s the way he makes me laugh. Or how I’ll never forget the way his voice turned all gentle when he told me I’m beautiful after I mentioned I didn’t fit in my jeans anymore.
All in all, he’s one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. Not everyone would have reacted so well to the news.
And you’re still lying to him.
Crap. I only need to get through this appointment. I don’t want this to stand between us any longer, because there’s already enough to worry about without that secret breathing down my neck. Now that he knows me better, will it really be a problem? I mean, he said his relationship with his coach is much stronger now, so it should be fine. I think.
“Sweetie. Are you still there?”