Each week I continued to have a session with Dayton, I questioned my sanity. Apparently, I needed to be firmer with him because the gentle comments of attempting to find him a new therapist had gone unnoticed. He’d make excuses and mediocre attempts to give me what he expected I wanted. Yet, it was all nonsense, circular, and inevitably useless for both of us. And I was done.
I concentrated on keeping my face relaxed despite the strong desire to roll my eyes at his current tirade. He’d even taken to lying on my couch, his feet propped up on the end as if that made a difference. It was such an elaborate show; it annoyed me beyond belief.
“My brother, now he’s someone who tried to steal my life from me. It wasn’t enough that he didn’t win the girl when Shayna flat out chose me, but he had to keep hanging on to her skirt tails. He was a beggar, happy for any morsel she’d give him. Of course, she was kind to him, but I knew how much she despised his constant attention. It was pointless. I didn’t care that we’d had an agreement to share between my friends, creating a united front for the city. In the end, there could only be one winner, and clearly, it would be me.”
“It sounds like you enjoy winning, being first?”
“Is that even a question? Of course, I do. That’s how you show everyone you’re the best and smartest. What’s the point if people aren’t envious of it?”
“You put a lot of value on what others think. Did you have feelings and want to be with this girl, Shayna?”
“Of course, I did. Don’t ask stupid questions. She was beautiful, the most attractive girl here at that time. She’d caught the eye of my two friends and brother. Of course, Seth was already promised to someone, but he wouldn’t have won in the end. Despite being the oldest, he didn’t have the stomach for things like I had. Our father saw that and began grooming me to take his place, only using Seth as leverage to make us stronger. We were only middle of the pack back then, but with each move my father made, the more power we accumulated.”
“Was power the only thing that mattered? What about how your brother felt, or even your friends? It sounds like you took something your brother cared about, and you only wanted to win.”
He dropped his legs to the floor, sitting up as he placed his elbows on his knees, searing me with a cold look. Fear rushed through me for the first time in his presence, and I found myself itching to grab the door. It was stupid of me to keep him on the schedule this late when no one else was in the office. He’d canceled earlier in the week and apparently had sounded desperate to Doris to be seen. She’d added him to my schedule before I could protest.
Yet, the entire time he’d been in session, all he’d done was complain about his son ruining his family name. First, because he couldn’t handle it—which apparently was a huge deal for him—second because he let sentimental relationships get in the way of making the hard choices, and third because now his son was too caught up in a woman to see what was right under his nose.
It was the third bullet point where he’d then trailed off to talk about how he’d handled a woman coming between him and his friends long ago. At this point, I was so bored and tired of hearing how great he was, I started to feel sorry for his son. This man was clearly a narcissist, and anyone trying to live up to his standards was doomed to fail.
But now, the shift in the energy as a whole made me tense as he pierced me with his gaze. I saw a flash of hatred and disgust as he looked at me, but it was quickly replaced with compliancy as he altered his entire stance in a split second. His shoulders slouched, his posture turned inward, and I watched as he began to fidget.
It was all fake, an illusion of what he wanted to show me. I’d given up at this point in figuring out the purpose because I was certain there wasn’t one. He was sent to torture me, plain and simple.
“Power had been the only thing my father saw as worthy, so I guess you’re right. I got caught up in it, taking what I wanted or thought would serve me the best. It wasn’t enough though, I still needed more to lord over him than power, so I took everything else he had.”
“How did your brother respond to you taking his things?”
“He fought back at times, and at others, he bowed to me, knowing I’d won. It was the last thing I took though that I enjoyed the most.”
“That sounds significant. What was different about that time?”
He smiled, that cold sinister one, that made my skin crawl as he peered back at me. “I told him I knew he’d been sleeping with my wife for years, so I planned a trip for them both to take.”
“You planned a trip for them?”
“Yes, it was rather extensive planning, and I felt proud of myself for all the thoughtful details I put into it for them,” he boasted, the smugness rubbing me wrong.
“That doesn’t sound like the behavior you reported in your relationship with your brother, to let him win in the end.”
“You’re very clever, Mrs. Carter,” he pointed, shaking his finger manically. “Well, you see, before he left, I told him it was okay that he was sleeping with my wife because I’d been raping,” he stopped as my stomach dropped out of me before he corrected himself. I didn’t buy it though. “Apologies, that’s not the proper word. I’d been role-playing with his slut of a girlfriend, some escort, for years, where I pretended to rape her for fun. She was into that sort of thing, you know,” he winked, making me want to bleach my eyes out. “In fact, he wasn’t even the father of his son. I was.”
“So let me make sure I understand this—” I started, but was cut off.
“You understand it perfectly, Mrs. Carter. Don’t play dumb.”
“Dayton, while I’m open to however you wish to express yourself, I do have boundaries, and one of them is respectful language toward me. Please do not speak to me in that way again.”
He clapped, standing, “Very good, Mrs. Carter. I was beginning to wonder if you had it in you.” He walked toward me, towering over me with his height. Swallowing, I licked my dry lips as I attempted to gather my thoughts and how I could get myself out of this situation in one piece.
“Um, you planned a trip but told your brother you’d been sleeping with his girlfriend and had gotten her pregnant, but she was under the assumption it was your brothers?”
“Exactly. So his son, who he hoped to raise to overtake me one day, was, in fact, mine. It was the last crushing blow to him as I sent him and my wife off to their forever vacation.”
He practically loomed over me at this point, and I leaned back in the chair as much as possible, not able to get up due to his position. I’d never been more scared in my life, and I knew I could never see him again, not after this. The power dynamics were off, and I couldn’t challenge him if I was afraid of him. His cologne was thick, suffocating me as he stared down at me. His face was blank again, no hint of anger anywhere, and it was scarier than all the anger he’d ever shown.
“Thank you for this session today, Mrs. Carter. You’ve been wonderful. I feel so much better since coming to see you. In fact, I think I’m cured. I’d like to terminate my therapy. I won’t be returning.”