“I know it would be really difficult to have me working in Brussels, but it would only be for one year and would be great experience to use to build my resume. I’d have to be there, with Leif, but you could fly back and forth between Brussels and New York. It’s not a really great flight, with one stop and it’s eleven hours with the layover in Paris, but if you needed to attend a meeting, you could fly to New York, stay for the meeting and do some business, and then fly back. You could do FaceTime or Zoom the rest of the time if you needed to conduct meetings…”
Luke glanced at me. “You really like the idea.”
“I do, but I understand if you think it’s impossible. I know Astra has a lot going on right now, with the deal coming up and everything. I know you want to get started moving forward on the agenda, but this is what I’ve always wanted…”
“I want you.” Luke took my hand and smiled, but I could see his smile was sad, like he was torn about the job. “I want you happy.”
Hell, I was torn about it. I had a new baby. I had really just started to feel at home at the beach house. I wasn’t even finished my dissertation yet…
“I want you,” I said. “I want you happy, too. What do you think? Tell me the truth…”
He sighed. “Well, to tell you the truth, this deal is an issue. The new investor and the new mystery partner want to move the headquarters to Texas.”
“Texas?” I said, unable to keep the tone out of my voice. It wasn’t that I had anything against Texas per se, but it was so far away from everything in my world. My parents, my school, and most of all, any job prospects in my chosen field. ‘That’s quite far away.”
“I know,” Luke said and kissed my hand. “I told the partner that I wasn’t really planning on moving the head offices anywhere. I could see having a regional office there, since there is a whole culture and commercial region built up around aerospace in Texas, but not the head offices. He was all about the tax situation and said he didn’t like the state taxes on corporations and individuals in New York.”
“They don’t pay corporate or personal tax in Texas?”
Luke nodded. “Apparently not. The new partners like that and want to move the project head offices there. There are other taxes in Texas, but the situation is beneficial to a corporation like Astra and whatever partnership we create.
I didn’t say anything, not able to imagine moving to Texas. It would be a desert for my career.
“I suppose it could be me who commuted from Texas to New York or Brussels. You could stay in Texas while I flew around the world, but my job would require me to be in Brussels during the week. I wouldn’t want to be away from Leif, and there would be childcare on site so I could see him any time during the day that I had free…”
“It sounds like a great opportunity for you,” Luke said. “Working for who?”
I described my former advisor and the work she was doing for an NGO located in Brussels. I talked about the job responsibilities, and the benefits and pay, including the childcare on site, which I really liked.
But I really didn’t like the idea of being separated from Luke during the week or the idea that he or I would have to fly eleven hours at a minimum to get to and from our locations.
It seemed unworkable.
I sighed, and to be honest, tears sprung to my eyes. I had initially thought it would be fine for Luke to be with me in Brussels and fly to New York when he needed. He found that a trip into Manhattan once or twice every two weeks for the day was more than enough and he did meetings on Zoom. The rest of the work he could do from his own office in the beach house.
“Hey,” Luke said and squeezed my hand. “Don’t worry about it. We’ll work something out if this is what you really want.” He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.
I wiped my eyes and forced a smile, but I really didn’t know what to do or what to think about the job. It was only for a year but would be a great addition to my CV and would look good if something even better came up, like with the UN in New York, which is what I really wanted.
I didn’t want to leave New York, although I had often considered moving to some other European country for international relations work. But that was before Luke and Leif…
“I have to give her a reply by Monday.”
“We can talk about it this weekend. I can try to talk to the new investors and see about opening a regional office in Houston that they can staff and run and keep the head office in New York. There’s always a workaround. Nothing is written in stone.”
I sighed and watched Leif playing with his toys in his playpen. He was plump and happy and was benefitting from both Luke’s and my attention for the past few months. To be honest, the job offer was premature. I didn’t plan on working until Leif was a year old and I was finished my dissertation. I figured I’d get some entry-level job in international relations after that year was up, hopefully in New York and would work my way up. I might be able to do a Post-Doc somewhere in Europe, in England or France and make connections in the academic world. Teaching at a university was always an option if I wanted it.
It was at that point that I made my decision.
I was going to turn down the job offer — neither Leif nor I were ready for it. I wanted more months at home with him before I put him in daycare. Even if the daycare was located on site in Brussels, it would mean he was being cared for by someone other than me for most of the day. I would have weekends and holidays and that was it.
That would come soon enough, but I wanted it to be when Leif was ready for it. When he was at least a year old. I was thinking eighteen months, to be honest.
There were a lot of mothers who had to leave their babies and work soon after delivery. Why have all the money Luke had and not be able to take advantage of time home with your child?
“I’m going to say no,” I said out loud, staring at the ocean down below the beach house property.
Luke squeezed my hand. “Don’t say no yet. Let it percolate over the weekend. You have until Monday…”
I shook my head. “No. It’s too soon. I planned on staying home with Leif for at least a year — eighteen months if possible. This job offer sounds great in principle, but it’s just not right for us at this time.” I turned to Luke and met his eyes. “That’s the reality of it. It’s not good for me or Leif or us. I’ll tell her on Monday, but the answer will be no.”
Luke kissed my hand. “It’s your decision.”
“No, it’s our decision. It’s all three of our lives. I have to think of all of us when I decide.”
Luke didn’t say anything, but his expression told me he was relieved that I would be saying no.
He had enough issues to deal with considering the new investors wanting to move to Texas and the fact that his adoptive parents might have arranged his parents’ deaths.
I didn’t want a job in Belgium to be another.