He opened his mouth, but she hushed him by placing her finger over his lips. “My early days with the CIA were spent proving myself. Not just as an operative, but as a woman in the field, and that was hard. I had to be better than any man and that wasn’t easy to do. By the time I was tasked with getting your team out, most of that had gone to the wayside.”
“Except for Lee.”
She nodded. “I worry that knowing about his attitude and hearing it over the radio affected how I approached things and now that we’re in this situation, I’m finding myself in the same place.”
“That’s pretty shitty and I’m sorry. I can talk to Hank and Jake if you—”
“Absolutely not,” she said. “First, I can fight my battles, and second, that’s just going to make me look like either I’m not a team player or I can’t handle anything that’s tossed my way, and that’s not what’s happening. I can do this. What concerns me is Lee and if he’s cut out for this. The information I was given about Lee before that mission all points to a narcissist. He’s also an adrenaline junkie.”
“I won’t argue those points.”
“I would like to ask Hank if he could get Lee’s discharge papers and find out if there was any bad blood between Lee and anyone he worked with after you left. You’re an excellent leader. You’re great at stabilizing situations and keeping someone like Lee in line, but I bet given time, he would have even overrun you.”
“I do know that his previous team leader asked for him to be transferred. Lee made it out to be that it wasn’t him that was the problem, but I know otherwise.”
“And yet you tried to make it work.” She found herself snuggling closer to Walker, resting her hand on his forearm. As if involuntary, her fingers glided up and down his skin.
“I was given my first opportunity to be a team leader. I wasn’t going to start off by asking one of my men to be reassigned. It was my job to make my men a cohesive team. If I didn’t, it was my failure.”
“Only, I’m not sure anyone can make Lee fall in line. Not even you.”
“You know that after that I’m going to have to kiss you, right?”
She let out a nervous laugh as she pressed her knee between his legs. “I don’t believe we’re going to be able to sleep if we don’t.”
Their tongues met in a fiery dance. It was the kind of tango that started off slow and sexy and built to an out-of-control passionate kiss. It was the kind of kiss you never wanted to end and if it did, it would only be because it was being replaced with something equally impressive.
She pressed her hand to the center of his chest and pushed him to his back. Straddling him, she pried her lips from his and tugged at the hem of her shirt.
“There’s no going back from this,” he whispered.
“I know.”
He dug his fingers into her thighs. “I don’t know that I can promise you anything.”
“I don’t expect you to.” She pulled the fabric over her head and tossed it to the floor. “Don’t read more into this than what it is. Pure attraction. It will run its course.”
“What if it doesn’t?”
Her breath caught in her throat. It took a long moment before she could find her words. She hadn’t expected that response from Walker. If anything, she would have thought he would have reminded her that this was one night to rid them of the growing tension between them. That was it. Nothing more. Nothing less.
He reached up and cupped the back of her neck, drawing her closer. “Make no mistake. I want you. But it’s not simple attraction. You’re under my skin. Ever since I saw you at Wind River, I haven’t stop thinking about you. Wondering what it would be like to be with you. I’ve just never had a real relationship.”
She gasped. Her heart dropped to her gut. Before she could respond, his hands and mouth were roaming her body in the most intimate ways. She might have been on top, but she sure as hell wasn’t in control.
He was and in every way that counted.
It had been a long time since she’d been with a man. It was rare that she found someone that not only challenged her intellectually, but made her body hum like a fine engine.
She arched her back as he took her nipple into his mouth, his arms cradling her body as if she were the most important thing in the world. She wasn’t sure she’d ever been with a man who’d dared to take charge and not let go.
Of course, she never thought she’d ever find one that she’d allow herself this kind of freedom. A man she wanted to be completely vulnerable with and show him her softer side. Her entire life she had to be tough as nails. She’d had to build this wall so high that it was impossible for anyone to either break down or climb over. The only way in was if she took the bricks down.
And tonight, there wasn’t a single one. The foundation of her self-protection had been destroyed and Walker was seeing every part of her. It was the most exquisite feeling in the world. With every other man she’d been with, letting them in even a little bit had been frightening. Those men hadn’t known what to do with the parts of her she’d hidden away from the world.
Walker was different. He cherished her with each touch and kiss. He accepted the real her and challenged her with his passion to expose his true self.
And she did just that.
He rolled her to her back, kissing his way across her skin, sending electric pulses to her brain, igniting her body with the kind of pleasure she never believed was reserved for those who understood what it was to love. It went beyond a physical need. Beyond lust. Beyond desire.
It wasn’t primal, like most experiences.
It was empowering.
It was equal.
It was real.