‘May I make one suggestion, though?’
‘Yes, of course.’
‘What if we become friends? I think that would have made our parents happiest of all.’
Relief bursts through me. ‘I’d like that, Heydar. I really would.’
* * *
‘Have you had a chance to peruse the plans yet, Your Highness?’
I blink at Henrik before shaking my head. ‘I’m sorry. Plans for what?’
‘The del Almodovár construction.’
?
?Oh.’ Heat lashes me. It’s been three months since I last saw Santiago and I can barely hear his name without breaking out in a sweat. I miss him in a way that defies reason and sense. I dream of him every night without fail. Well, not dream, exactly, because to dream I would have to sleep, and I find that sleep mostly eludes me. But I remember him. I impose him into my life and my bed, so that I reach for him at all hours and imagine his hands on my body. It is frustrating and soul-destroying, so each morning I wake with a deeper sense of loneliness than the day before.
I have deliberately avoided doing anything to make this harder, which includes typing his name into an Internet search browser or looking at the information I’m being bombarded with about the casino.
‘You should see how the design has panned out,’ my Prime Minister continues. ‘I think you’ll like the direction he’s taken the project in.’
‘I will,’ I lie. ‘I just haven’t had a moment.’
‘Of course. Your coronation preparations must be in full swing.’
I force a smile to my face.
‘You will come to the ground-breaking, though?’ he asks. ‘The media will be there. It’s important, I think, that you are seen to support the project.’
My eyes close for a moment and then I nod. I know I can’t ignore it. Henrik is right. My absence would indeed be conspicuous. ‘Yes, I’ll be at the ground-breaking, Henrik.’
* * *
The moment my car pulls up I see him. How can I not? Even in a crowd of faces, Santiago is impossible to miss––tall, broad-shouldered, wearing jeans, and a dark jacket in deference to the fact the temperature has turned cool. I dig my fingernails into my palms to stop myself from doing something truly stupid, such as running to him.
I want to.
I want to so badly.
But I can’t.
For one thing, everything’s changed between us. He hasn’t called or texted since that morning in the palace three and a half months ago. I don’t doubt that he’s moved on, though thank God I have no confirmation of that. To see photographs of him with another woman would kill me.
The door to my car is opened and the crowd grows quiet. In the distance, there are rope garlands with people lined up behind them. I must greet them first, before I join the assembly of officials. I step out of the car and an enormous cheer erupts. Without needing to look in his direction, I feel his eyes on me, their intensity searing my soul.
Walking towards the first cluster of people, I accept a bouquet of flowers and a teddy bear. I stop and chat to an old woman, who remembers meeting my mother, then a young girl, who is dressed in a gown and tiara. She gives me a hand-written invitation to her birthday party, and as I hand it to Claudia I whisper to ask her to send cupcakes as a birthday present. On and on it goes, for twenty minutes at least, before finally I’m at the end of the line and Henrik awaits.
‘Your Highness...’ The Prime Minister beams from ear to ear. ‘How delightful to see you.’
I focus on his face, but it doesn’t matter. My peripheral vision has picked up Santiago. I’m aware of his proximity and know that I must soon come face to face with him. I don’t know if I have the strength for this.
Claudia, beside me, puts her hand briefly on mine, squeezing it, and I know then that she understands. She’s pieced it all together. Her gesture does indeed give me some strength.
Turning to face Santiago is like being struck by lightning.
He is the same, but different. His hair has been cut shorter, and I see that what I had thought were jeans are actually the dark trousers of the suit he wears. There is no tie, but he looks so formal compared to usual garb. His dark eyes stare through me, and my heart rabbits against my ribs so hard it hurts.