“He made his decision, and it is to marry Melania. And I have made mine.”
“And you’ve decided you don’t want this?” He tilted her chin so that her eyes clashed with his.
“I want to do what is right by my people, my family and by you as well.”
“Don’t make this about me. If you wanted to do what was right by me you would own up to the feelings you have.”
“And what about me?” She said quietly. “Do you want to do right by me, as you say?”
He swallowed. “Of course.”
Her hands lifted to his chest of their own accord, her fingers splayed over the muscular wall. “Then let me go. As you did that day in New York, let me go. I have a life here, and you cannot be a part of it.”
He ignored the pain in his gut. “I didn’t let you go, Lilah. I let you walk away from me but I have carried you here with me every day since then.” He pressed his fingers into his chest then captured one of her hands in his. “I have relived every moment of the time we shared in the cabin. I have dreamed of you and ached for you. I loved Maddie. After I lost her, I never thought I would feel that again. I didn’t want to feel this for you. I sure as hell wasn’t looking for it. But I have never once doubted that I love you, and that you love me.”
“Please,” the word was shaky and her emotions were a throbbing, heaving force. Jealousy. Sorrow. Pity. And yes, love by the bucket-full. “This isn’t appropriate.”
He made a noise. “Say you don’t love me, Lilah. That’s all you have to do. Look into my eyes and tell me that you don’t love me. Say those words to me knowing how much I love you. Tell me you don’t love me now, to my face. Say it.”
Tears were sliding down her cheeks. A wind rose from the desert, brushing her hair over her face. She moved to pull it aside at the same time he did. Their fingers connected and she shook her head hopelessly. “Please don’t do this to me. Don’t offer me everything I want in life knowing it’s beyond my power to grab it.”
“I’m right here. All you have to do is say yes. The details we can work out later.”
“No,” she shook her head. “I know we can’t.” She fluttered her eyes shut. “I love you. I love you like you love me. But it is futile and pointless.”
“You love me.” A huge smile creaked across his handsome face.
“I have always loved you.”
“Even that day at the cabin when you switched into some kind of Stepford Princess?”
She laughed but her heart was breaking. “What do you think?”
“And yet you left me.”
“I had to.”
“And did you miss me?”
She blinked up at him, and nodded. “What do you think?”
“I think that you need to face up to the fact that running away from me is only going to hurt us both.” He gripped her hands in his. “What’s the worst that can happen? We will speak to Kiral. Together.”
“He won’t approve.”
“Then we will make him!” Will couldn’t stop smiling now. “Don’t you see? This love makes us powerful.” He expelled a soft breath. “Lilah, I have known love, and God knows I have known loss. I am not going to lose you.” He kissed her on the tip of her nose. “Life is so short, sweetheart. It is precious and it is fleeting and no one and nothing should stand in the way of what makes you happiest of all. For me, that’s you.”
“No.” She could feel the tide of his words pulling her away and it terrified her. Too far into the ocean of his promises and she knew she would drown. “No. This is not the way. It isn’t right. I cannot ever be what you want of me.”
Will could have groaned in frustration. She was so close to letting go of all of the ridiculous notions that held her back, but still she held him at arms length. Even beneath his gaze he saw her transform herself into the untouchable princess he had first met.
Artifice and Grace.
He stepped away from her, anger coursing through his veins. “You either want me or you don’t.”
“You know I do,” she implored, reaching out and hooking her fingers around his arm. He pulled away.
“You can’t have it both ways. You can’t say ‘I do but I don’t’. Tell me now, Lilah, once and for all. Do you want me enough? Enough to find a way to make this work, knowing that I will stand by your side and protect you from whatever anger your brother feels? Do you love me enough to risk his disapproval?”