“No, it doesn’t.” She felt that she’d won a minor victory in a war that could never be claimed. “It’s all besides the point.”
“Yes.” He nodded jerkily. What had he been hoping? That she’d hear about someone else in his life and put aside her doubts and hesitations?
“Would you excuse me, Will?”
“You have a habit of running away from me,” he said softly, and now he looked at her and saw the woman he’d fallen in love with. Beneath the make up and the glamorous gown
, he saw Lilah as she’d been in the woods. He dropped his hand and pressed it quickly to hers. “Dance with me first.”
She stared down at their hands. He was no longer touching her but her fingers seemed to tingle from the contact.
“It’s not possible.”
“Why?”
She swallowed, and darted her tongue out to lick her lips. “I … I have things I must do tonight. People to speak to.”
He pulled a droll face. “Kiral’s instructed you to speak to me.”
“I know.” She shook her head. “Will, if I dance with you, everyone will know …”
“How you feel?” He prompted curiously.
“What we did.” Her cheeks flamed. “I think it’s best if we act like what we should be: what we should always have been. Distant acquaintances.”
“If that’s what you want,” he shrugged nonchalantly, as though her obvious regret didn’t cut him to the core.
What she wanted? What she wanted was to break free of this beautiful torture. “It is.” She studied him, taking in every detail of his face. “Goodbye, Will.”
She could feel tears stinging behind her eyes as she walked through the ballroom. She kept her eyes focused on a doorway in the distance, and sashayed purposefully in an effort to deter anyone from speaking to her. Several guests tried to flag her down but Lilah was resolute. She knew that if she didn’t find solitude she risked bursting into tears in front of a thousand palace visitors. Talk about a spectacle!
Will felt like he’d been suckerpunched. What had he been expecting? That she’d see him and welcome him with open arms? No, nothing so absurd and fanciful. But he’d hoped that he would see some flicker of recognition. Something other than shame and regret.
Is that how she viewed their relationship?
Did she regret what had happened between them?
Did she wish she could click her fingers and push it away?
He made a sound of frustration and began to move through the crush of people. The smell of perfume was strong. Which direction had she gone? She’d moved quickly, there was no sign of her in any direction.
He shook his head. There’d be time to talk to her. Privately. Alone. But to what end?
He lifted a flute of champagne from one of the trays and tried to push the beautiful princess from his mind. He had been to hundreds of formal events like this. Not exactly like this, he corrected, for there was surely not an event in history that rivaled the grandeur and excess of the Delani Royal Banquet.
He noted the details almost dispassionately. The swathes and swathes of flowers that hung in garlands from the walls and stood proudly in gold and diamond vases around the room were accentuated by thousands of tiny fairy lights that had been made to twinkle like the stars. The food was exquisite, and the champagne the very best money could buy. There were enormous photographs surrounded by gold gilt frames, or perhaps they were real gold. Will moved towards the pictures as if drawn to them by a magnetic force. Kiral and Melania were in the centre, their faces smiling, both dressed in the ceremonial attire of Delani. And to either side were portraits of their parents, and then siblings.
Lilah.
His gut twisted.
He had loved her, and he had been certain she felt the same way. And yet she couldn’t have, to have left him so easily. He would never have been able to walk away from her so simply. He groaned softly then spun on his heel.
He had to forget about her.
* * *
The horse ran fast beneath her. Lilah leaned closer, wrapping her arms around his neck, staring at the hills of the desert far in the distance. She stared at them until her eyes stung from the cool night air rather than the tears that were falling from her eyes unchecked. She sobbed, certain that no one could hear her here. No one except her faithful horse, and he wouldn’t pass judgment.