He didn’t want Maddie to go. The realisation came to him as if struck by lightning. He wasn’t ready to end this. Not yet. He turned to face her and smiled past the blinding pain. “Thank you, dottore.”
Chapter 12
“I DIDN’T KNOW. NOT at first.” She’d stopped shaking, but she was still pale, so the bruise on her cheek was all the more obvious. He couldn’t look at her without wishing he’d succumbed to his first instincts and laid into Michael with all the might of his fists.
But he hadn’t.
For two reasons. It would be so much easier for prosecutors to make their case if the violence had been unprovoked, and unanswered. And secondly, he never wanted Maddie to think him capable of the kind of violence Michael had exhibited. He was a different kind of man. Even when his temper was pushed to breaking point, he remained in control.
He was safe. Reliable.
He reached an arm along the back of the sofa, stroking her hair gently. “I believe you.”
“Do you?” Her eyes were hollow. She sipped her tea – he’d lost count of how many she’d had since everyone had finally left and they were alone once more.
“Of course.” And he did, without hesitation.
“That day I met you, I didn’t know who lived here, I didn’t know anything. Even when you said your name, I didn’t realise.”
He recalled that – the oddness of her not knowing he was a Montebello, how refreshing it was to engage with a woman who wasn’t familiar with his life story and his bank balance.
“I woke up – after we’d…after that first time – and all I could think about was Michael and the fact you were old friends. Oh, God, Nico, I was so terrified. I felt like I’d made the worst mistake of my life.” She bit down on her lip, her eyes beseeching. “Not in sleeping with you, but because of your connection to him. I’d spent six months trying to get away from him, to forget him, to move on with my life and then you…” She sucked in a big gulp of air. “Why did you have to know him? What are the chances of that, Nico?”
He nodded, understanding. It was a cruel joke, in some ways. “So you ran back to La Villetta. Were you planning to leave Italy?” He didn’t know why but the idea of that felt like he’d swallowed a fistful of barbed wire. He didn’t want to go near it, didn’t want to analyse how he would have felt if he’d got to La Villetta that stormy summer’s afternoon and found that she’d already left.
If he’d never got to see her again.
“No.” A hollow smile. “By the time the cab dropped me off, I was a little calmer.”
She looked down and his gut contracted painfully. “I never do anything like we did that afternoon. It was so random. I don’t know what came over me but I met you and I just…” Her sentence petered into nothing. She bit down on her lip, shaking her head a little.
“I know.” He ran his fingers over her hair, so gently, wishing in that moment that the only touch she’d ever known was like this – so reverential and full of respect. “I was there. I was struck by the same lightning bolt.”
She looked towards him, her eyes enormous. “That’s exactly what it was like!”
He nodded thoughtfully, playing it out in his mind.
“I should have sent you away again.” Her eyes were enormous in her face. “But I wanted to be selfish.” She lifted a hand to his chest, as though she couldn’t help herself.
“Selfish?”
She shook her head slowly. “Michael had already taken so much away from me. He controlled everything about my life. I didn’t want to give you up because of him.” She squared her shoulders, her dainty features assuming a defiant look. “I wanted you and the only reason I would have walked away from what you were offering was because I was afraid. I refused to be afraid anymore.”
Fierce pride exploded through him.
“I thought about telling you,” she said quietly. “I hated lying to you and once you knew about him – not who he was – but that there’d been someone like him in my life, I felt like it was an actual lie. Like I was purposefully keeping a secret from you. But I didn’t know…”
“I would have believed you,” he promised, knowing instinctively that it mattered to her to hear that, and wanting her to understand that his trust in her was absolute.
“I know.” Her eyes were fierce when they connected to his and a pulse of understanding throbbed between them. “But I didn’t know if it would change things. He’s one of your oldest friends. You knew him for years before you knew me. It would have complicated everything and you were the first good thing to happen to me in a really long time.” Her words reached inside of him, filling him with a swirling pool of mess. “I just wanted to hold onto that, to you. I just wanted to hold onto this for as long as possible.”
He closed his eyes for a moment, nodding, the fact their summer was almost over sitting at odds with her admission just now. He stroked her hair lightly, toying with the ends, and when he inhaled he caught a hint of her beautiful floral fragrance.
“The last time I saw Michael, I suspected he was way off the rails. He’d had a lot of potential in school but a huge ego and a dark streak I never fully appreciated.” Nico shook his head. “It was a few years ago – before you met him, I presume?”
She nodded.
“I always felt like I should have done more. I wished I’d got him into rehab or something –,”