I roll my eyes. ‘Because it looks good to his corporate investors?’
‘No, Miss Cynical, because he understands that humanity is only as good as the way we treat those in need. He’s a good guy, Asha. You’d like him.’
Am I imagining that his voice sounds raw and throaty? Probably, because his look is completely relaxed. Amused, even.
My gut feels like a stone has rolled through it. I don’t want to have this conversation with him, but here I am, in the middle of what we’ve agreed to, trapped by it, and held in place by how completely okay Theo is with all of this. ‘Okay, what else?’
‘He’s independently wealthy—self-made.’
‘How do you know him?’
‘I went to school with him. Scholarship kid.’
‘And he’ll be at the wedding?’
‘He’s like a brother to us—to all of us. Yeah, he’ll be there.’
I dip my head again, not sure what to say, not sure how I feel. The wedding is still far enough away that I don’t really want to think about it. And yet I lift my head and lance him with the directness of my stare. ‘What’s the deal with you and weddings, anyway?’
‘Weddings? Nothing.’
But it’s forced. I know him better than that; I understand him.
‘Come on.’ I reach across and squeeze his hand. ‘No one’s born hating love. What happened?’
His expression doesn’t shift.
‘Did a girl break your heart?’ My tone is teasing, purposely kept light.
He doesn’t respond.
‘Or a guy?’
One brow lifts with mocking amusement.
‘Come on, Theo. What’s the deal?’
‘Does it matter?’
Does it? It shouldn’t, and yet... ‘I’m curious.’ And then my toe runs over his calf. ‘Indulge me.’
‘I intend to.’
My pulse races, but there’s a niggle of frustration too.
Perhaps he detects that because he expels a breath as he lifts a hand, signalling for the bill.
‘There’s no great secret. No heartbreak. I just had plenty of opportunity to see what relationships do to people. It’s not pretty. I think I was about ten years old when I swore I’d be single for ever.’
Sympathy makes my heart hurt. ‘You were just a boy, though. Surely at some point you grew out of that?’
‘Are you kidding?’ His grin shows a total lack of regret. ‘I’m not cut out for relationships, Asha. This is who I am. I grew up in a house that was constantly shaking from arguments, fights, disagreements, affairs.’ He shakes his head. ‘My brother Holden is dealing with the fallout of our father’s bullshit decisions even now, decades later. Love makes people stupid, reckless and malicious. Why would I sign up for that?’
‘Because love can also make people happy?’
‘I am happy,’ he says simply. ‘There’s not a single part of me that feels like I’m missing out.’
His determination is hard to argue with.