He wasn’t about to explain himself now. Or ever. It was too late to apologise. But giving her the money would be a good way to make amends.
But as he looked into those luminous blue eyes the blood pounded back into his groin. And he realised he had a bigger problem to handle than any lingering sense of guilt.
Why hadn’t the mind-blowing orgasm been enough?
‘But you can’t give me a hundred grand.’ She pulled her hand out of his. ‘That’s a lot of money.’
‘Do you want to save your theatre or not?’ he replied impatiently. He wanted the money out of the way, so he could deal with the more pressing problem of how to re-establish control over his libido.
‘Yes—yes, I do. But…’ She trailed off.
‘Then why are you trying to talk me out of this?’
‘Because it’s a hundred thousand pounds!’
‘Issy, I spent close to that on my last car. It’s not that much money. Not to me.’
Her eyebrows rose. ‘I didn’t know architecture was that lucrative.’
‘It is when you do it right,’ he said. And had to stifle the foolish desire to say a lot more.
He’d qualified two years early, beaten off a series of more experienced applicants to win a huge design competition, and then worked his backside off. And in the last three years it had paid off.
The Florence practice had won kudos around the world. He’d opened another office in Paris. Won a slew of prestigious architectural awards. And best of all he didn’t have to bother entering competitions any more. The clients came to him. He was proud of how he’d managed to tame the destructiveness that had ruled his teenage years and turn his life around.
But he resisted the urge to launch into a list of his accomplishments. He didn’t boast about his achievements. He didn’t need anyone’s approval. So why should he need Issy’s?
‘If it makes you feel better,’ he began, ‘I’ve been thinking of opening an office in London for a while.’ Which wasn’t exactly the truth. ‘The Florence practice donates over a million euros to worthy causes every year. It’s great PR and it keeps Luca, my tax accountant, happy.’ Which was the truth. ‘Sponsoring your theatre makes good business sense.’
She pressed her hands to her mouth, her eyes widening to saucer size. ‘Oh. My. Lord. You’re serious!’ she shrieked, the decibel level muffled by her hands. ‘You’re actually going to give us the money.’ She grasped his hand in both of hers. ‘Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me. And all the people who work at the Crown and Feathers.’
But he had a feeling he did know. And it made him feel uncomfortable. His reasons weren’t exactly altruistic. And they were getting less altruistic by the second.
‘I wish I knew how to thank you,’ she said.
He almost told her it wasn’t her thanks he wanted. But stopped himself because he’d just figured out what it was he did want.
He wanted Issy Helligan out of his system.
The girl and now the woman had been a fire in his blood for well over ten years. Why not admit it? He didn’t fixate on women, but somehow he’d got fixated on her.
He’d tried walking away. He’d tried denial. And neither had worked.
Sorting out her financial troubles would finally put the guilt and responsibility from their past behind them. So why not take the next step? He had to return to Florence this afternoon, and he wanted Issy with him. So he could burn the fire out once and for all. Forget about her for good.
‘There’s only one snag,’ he said, the white lie tripping off his tongue without a single regret.
No need to tell Issy about his plans yet.
She had a tendency to overreact, she was totally unpredictable, and she had a terrible track record for complicating sex with emotion. Better to get her to Florence first, and then deal with any fall-out.
‘Oh, no—what?’ she said, her face crumpling comically.
‘You’ll have to come to Florence with me. This afternoon.’
‘To Florence?’ She looked even more astonished than she had by the offer of money. But when he saw the flash of interest in her eyes he had a tough time keeping the smile of triumph off his face.
She needed this as much as he did. The only difference was she hadn’t figured it out yet.