‘I do love you. And it’s not because you’re incredible in bed, or one of the richest guys on the planet. Or because you’ve supported my business, supported me.’ She let out a weak laugh as the confused frown descended on his face.
No one had ever loved him for who he was. But she did. And she intended for him to know it and believe it. Then they would see.
‘Why, then?’ he asked, as if he genuinely didn’t know. And she had the opening she needed.
‘It’s because you let me follow you around like a puppy that summer and you never once complained. It’s because you blamed yourself for what happened to my mother, to me, when it was never your fault.’
‘But you suffered so much,’ he said.
‘And so did you,’ she said, realising so much of that valiant boy—who had wanted payback for his own mother and had taken on a monster to do it—still existed, even if he couldn’t see it. ‘It’s because when I rang your bell all those months ago, you insisted on tending my leg.’
‘I was planning to seduce you,’ he qualified again. ‘I needed a wife.’
She grinned. ‘Do you hear me complaining?’
‘You were innocent,’ he said, his eyes dark with the heat and intensity she had come to adore. ‘However much you enjoyed it,’ he added, cupping her cheek.
She felt the sizzle of heat, and the connection that had always been there, ever since that summer, arc between them.
She covered his hand, leant into the caress. ‘I loved that you were so scared of exploiting that innocence, even though it really wasn’t a big deal to me,’ she said, loving his concerned frown even more.
Honestly, men! What was the big deal with virginity?
‘And because you fought to give me security and stability in this marriage,’ she added, the swelling in her chest making her heart beat in hard, heavy thuds. ‘Even though it was supposed to be fake.’
‘It never felt fake, even when I wanted it to,’ he murmured, cupping her other cheek, and touching her forehead with his.
At last, she’d broken through that shield he erected to protect himself from rejection. The shield that had made him believe he didn’t deserve to be loved. That he didn’t deserve her.
The connection was so sure, so solid, she could hear it in his ragged breathing. How ridiculous that they’d both denied the importance of that connection for so long.
‘It’s because you’re the kind of man who wants to give children like Enzo the helping hand you never had,’ she continued. ‘And because you pulled out all the stops to help me achieve my dream, even when I was busy sabotaging it with self-doubt.’ She sighed. ‘And because you gave me a foot rub to try and ease my pain.’
‘That’s such a small thing,’ he murmured, his voice barely a whisper as she held his waist and he caressed her neck, his fingers threading into her hair.
‘Well, it was a really excellent foot rub,’ she said, smiling at him. ‘So not that small.’ Then she sobered. ‘It’s the small things that matter, Dominic. As much as, if not more than, the big things.’ She drew back, so she could look into his eyes. The small things they’d both been denied by living separate lives when they deserved to be together.
‘Now do you believe I love you?’ she asked quietly.
He nodded. ‘But do you love me enough to stay with me?’ he asked, the yearning, the longing that she’d thought was hers alone clear in his voice.
She sucked in a deep breath. Knowing it would be so easy to just say yes. She already had so much more than she’d thought she’d have. But she couldn’t chicken out. Her cowardice—and his—had brought them to this point. Now they both needed to be brave. He’d been brave enough to admit how unsure he was about love. She needed to be brave enough to demand what she needed.
‘I want to stay, but I have conditions.’
His eyebrow arched. ‘Conditions? What kind of conditions? Are we going to have to renegotiate the contract again?’
She laughed, the breath releasing in a rush. Maybe this was going to be much easier than she had assumed. ‘No, we’re going to have to tear it up.’
‘I see,’ he said.
‘I don’t want a time limit on our marriage. I want... I want us to be a real couple in every sense of the word. I don’t want to limit my feelings for you. And I want us to live together. Either in London or New York, or wherever works.’
He nodded. ‘I’m sure we can work something out,’ he said, and her heart leapt into her throat.
‘I want to be able to tell you I love you. And know that it doesn’t scare you, or threaten you or—’
‘It doesn’t,’ he said, interrupting her. ‘It humbles me.’