Because—holy cow—I spent a load of cash on this dog.
When I’d picked her up from the breeders, they had her freshly groomed.
Oh, my gosh—she even had pink bows and a collar—which I’d stuffed inside my bag.
“Your daddy needs to think he’s rescuing you,” I told the happy, panting puppy. “We have to be convincing, so you need to look more disheveled.”
I poured the rest of my dressing on her and worked it into her coat.
She put her paws on my chest. Then she licked my face.
I giggled, and said, “You smell like I want to eat you for lunch. We need to do something else.”
I looked out the windows in my car and saw a solution.
“Come with Mommy.” I scooped her up and opened the car door. After I shut it, I carried her to a pile of dirt. The landscapers had been doing some work around the building, and they’d dumped it here a few days ago.
“I’m sure they won’t mind us playing in here for a minute.”
I dropped my oily new friend into the black soil—and she immediately took off into it.
Oh, crap.
“Hey, come back here!” I shouted and lurched forward. Unfortunately, puppies were fast.
A lot faster than me.
I landed face first in the dirt.
After I pushed myself up and spat out the dirt from my mouth—I glanced around for the little stinker.
“You’re a bad one, aren’t you?” I spoke in a serious tone to my new roommate.
I swear—she smiled.
Mocking me with her cute little face. She was higher up on the pile, now, and if she decided to continue down the other side—yikes.
The street wasn’t too far away.
“Why didn’t I put a leash on you?” I chastised myself for not thinking ahead. How stupid. “Come here, baby. I’ll give you a treat, okay?”
She didn’t understand that too well.
Instead, she lowered her front half and raised her butt—wagging her tail and growling.
“It’s not time to play chase, little missy. It’s time to go home.”
Man, this was a crappy idea.
Not getting the dog.
That was a great idea.
But the messing her up and trying to pass her off as a dumpster dog idea.
Yeah, I should have thought about that for a while longer.
Slowly, very, very slowly, I moved my hands closer to her.