“Don’t be an idiot, Miller.”
Tox’s head shot up and he saw the ghost of a smile on Sharon Frank’s face.
She continued. “In a loving, mutual, committed relationship, the bear should absolutely come out. Your partner should be the recipient of all your passion and unfiltered emotions. A relationship without those things is ultimately unfulfilling. Hell, I’ve treated plenty of women, and men actually, whose chief complaint is that their partner won’t uncage their bear, as you say. But that uncaging has to be organic and come from a place of trust, not desperation. The bear’s job in a romantic relationship is to bring passion and honesty, not emotionally wrestle your partner into submission. Do you understand?”
“I think so,” Tox nodded.
“Let’s try something.”
“Okay.”
“I want you to continue dating this woman. Is that the term you’re using? Dating?”
“Sure.”
“Continuing with your bear metaphor, I want you to monitor your bear. Can you do that?”
“I think so.”
“Close your eyes and picture the bear inside you. Where is he?”
“In my head. In a tall cage, like an old cage in a circus caravan.”
“Excellent. And what is he doing right now?”
“He’s asleep,” Tox smirked with his eyes still closed.
“And when you’re with this woman?” She checked her notes on her tablet. “Calliope?”
“He rattles the bars.”
“But you are his keeper. You decide when to let him out. The bear can’t break down the door.”
“I…I’m not sure.”
“It wasn’t a question, Miller.”
“Oh, right. Sorry.”
“In a passionate, profound relationship, the bear can come out. You can bare your soul and show your partner your true self, but you’re nowhere near that stage. Correct?”
“Correct.”
“So, get to know this woman. If you feel at any point, you are losing control of your bear, take a step back. The more you are able to do that, the more confident you will become about your ability to be in a mature, committed relationship that is reciprocated by your partner. We don’t want the bear in charge. Do you understand why?”
“Yeah, you don’t want the bear to hurt anyone.”
“No, Miller. I don’t want the bear to hurt you.”
In the lobby of the building, Tox pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Calliope: Are you free tomorrow? I’d like to take you to dinner.
Her response had him grinning as he emerged onto Broadway: Definitely.