“We need to get up and out to the party. Let’s go get cleaned up.” I let him take me to the bathroom. He made sure the door that went to Slash’s room was locked. He told me each guy had his own room but shared the bath with another.
After we were clean and I got redressed and my hair tamed down, we went out to rejoin the others. As soon as we hit the common room, those still inside grinned and clapped. I knew I turned beet red. Ajax flipped them the middle finger, and I hid my face in his chest. This had the guys laughing. Ajax mercifully got me outside. I couldn’t believe they had heard us. Although, I hadn’t been worrying about screaming either.
We went over to where the ladies were sitting and chatting. After seating me in a chair and getting me a soda, he kissed me and went to join some of the guys. Madisen gave me a smirk. Shit, here it goes.
“So, it sounded like the argument went well. All made up, are we?”
“Hush, I don’t want to hear it. The guys inside clapped. I thought I was going to die of embarrassment,” I groaned. All three of them laughed.
“Honey, you’ll have to get used to them. Hell, most of them have had sex in front of each other in the past,” Jocelyn said.
I looked at her stunned. “Really?”
“Yeah, really. The single ones still do. You missed it when you left early the last time. If you don’t want to see things, stay clear of the common room and even outside when it gets that time.”
I sat there thinking about what she said. I had to assume Ajax had done it. Did he still like to do that? Would he expect me to have sex with him where we could be seen? I didn’t think I could do that. The idea made my stomach cramp. I’d have to talk to him about this later. I was distracted from my thoughts by Devyn sighing and rubbing her stomach. A grimace came across her face.
“Are you okay, Devyn?” I asked her anxiously. She was only a month away from her due date.
She nodded. “I’m fine. Just little man is kicking the hell out of me right now. Want to feel it?” I leaned over and lightly laid my hand on her stomach. I’d never touched a pregnant woman’s stomach before. The kick I felt had me jerking in surprise.
“That’s crazy. So strong. Does it hurt a lot?” I asked her in awe.
“Only when he kicks my ribs. The rest are more uncomfortable rather than painful. When he’s on my bladder, I could cry because I need to run to the bathroom every five minutes.”
Jocelyn was nodding in agreement. She was only about six or seven weeks behind Devyn. Madisen was barely out of her first trimester. Looking at all these pregnant women, I was partially glad I’d been on birth control for my periods. Because if not, with as much as we’d been going at it, I’d probably already be pregnant.
Don’t get me wrong, I wanted kids. I thought having them with Ajax would be wonderful. I just didn’t know if he wanted them. If he did, we were just starting our relationship. This would be a conversation for later. After feeling her stomach, they talked about what they were craving and feeling. It was eye-opening to hear this. I stored it away for future reference.
We were interrupted by the guys coming over to join us. The rest of the day passed in a riot of fun and relaxation. We talked, the guys played pool and even darts. The food was great. Later, we played music and had the firepits going when it got dark.
I was sitting on Ajax’s lap outside around one of the firepits when I saw the club bunnies show. I subconsciously knew they’d likely be here tonight. They usually came on weekends. Madisen had told me. As they started to go up to the single guys, I squirmed. I didn’t want to see this. Ajax tugged me back into his chest.
“You ready to go, babe?” I nodded my head in relief. We quickly said our goodbyes. I hugged the girls and got on his bike. He took off for the apartment. I wasn’t worried about his riding after drinking. He’d switched a while ago to water and soda. As we walked up to my place, I stayed quiet. I couldn’t seem to stop thinking about those bunnies and Ajax being with them. I could feel old insecurities creeping up on me. Seeing Daisy staring at Ajax hadn’t helped. We’d barely gotten inside when Ajax had me pinned to the wall.
“Tell me what’s wrong. You’re not saying a word and you have a worried look on your face.” he said while caressing my cheek.
“Can’t we get ready for bed first? Then I’ll tell you.” I could see he didn’t want to wait, but he agreed and let me go. I went to the bedroom with him on my heels. Once inside, I got undressed. I needed a shower, so I went to the bathroom. I wasn’t surprised when he joined me, though I insisted on washing myself. I knew it only made him wonder even more what I was thinking because I always let him wash me. After we were done, I went to grab a nightgown. Ajax stopped me.
“What in the hell is wrong? You don’t wear anything to bed with me, babe. You’re starting to worry me. Did I do something?”
I sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. I kept my eyes on the floor. “Will you miss it?”
“Miss what?” I could hear the confusion in his voice.
“The parties and the women. Will you miss being able to party with the other guys? Because as much as I love you, I can’t share, and I don’t want to be out where people can see us together when we have sex,” I told him in a rush. I might as well get it all out.
He kneeled and raised my chin so he could see my eyes. “Nymph, where did you get the idea, I’d miss that? Or that I’d want to have sex out in front of other people.”
“The girls told me how the guys do that. It got me thinking that you must have and if you’d miss it and want us to do it. And those women, those bunnies, are super sexy. Won’t you miss them?” I choked out. Talking about them made me want to cry. They were all sexy and pretty. They weren’t like me. I had more meat on me, and my stomach wasn’t flat. I had curves. Tears filled my eyes. Ajax stood and lifted me back in the center of the bed.
As he laid me down, he curled next to me and stared down at me. “Jessica, look at me. I want you to hear me. I don’t and won’t want anyone else. Yes, I’ve been with those women. I’m not proud of it, but they will never be what you are to me. As for them being sexy, they don’t hold a candle to you in that department. I will admit to having sex where others could see me. I didn’t care. I don’t care, but I’d never expect that from you. If you don’t want that, we’ll never go there. You just tell me what you’re comfortable with. I’ll gladly take you to my room or our place.”
“But if you like to be out in front of others and I don’t—”
“I didn’t say I like it. I don’t usually care. If you don’t like it, then there is no way I will. Those women never gave a damn who saw them. I will tell you that if we stay at parties, you will see people having sex. It’s a guarantee. But we can leave like we did tonight, or go to my room. I never want you to be uncomfortable, baby.” He leaned down and kissed me softly on the lips.
I kissed him back. “Okay. I don’t think I’d like it if others saw us. I feel like what we do is private and not open to others watching. They can know we did it, like today, even though that was embarrassing. I just don’t want them to see what we did. Does that make sense?”
“Yeah, that makes total sense. Now, was there anything else bothering you?” I shook my head no. I didn’t want to discuss kids with him yet.
“Good, then how about you let me show you how much you mean to me?”
I smiled at his suggestion. He proceeded to show me not just once but twice before we fell asleep. I knew I was smiling as I slipped off. His arms around me made me feel safe and loved. Something I hadn’t felt in years.