Chapter 7: Rebel
I saw Madisen’s face go pale and then her eyes rolled back in her head and she collapsed. Thank God I had my arms around her so she didn’t fall. I yelled for the guys and lowered her to the ground. She was limp and not moving. Panic raced through me. Had she gotten hurt when I slammed her to the ground? I frantically ran my hands down her body trying to feel for an injury.
Bull dropped down beside me. “Move over and let me. Did she hit her head or anything?”
I thought back. “No, I’d made sure her head was protected.”
“It could just be the shock of everything over the last couple of hours. Anything else she might have complained about before?”
“She didn’t complain of anything, though she did vomit once. But that was due to the conversation we were having.”
He threw me a puzzled look. “What conversation would have made her vomit?”
I didn’t want to tell him or the others, but they might as well know how much I’d fucked up. “The one where she accused me of fucking not only CeeCee but others and then got scared I might have given her something because we haven’t been using protection. She said she needed to go to the doctor to get checked out and then vomited.” Just telling them that made me want to scream. I’d fucked it up so bad with her.
“Shit,” I heard the guys mutter. Bull grunted.
“We know you haven’t been with anyone and she will know it soon too. She’s upset. I know damn well you wouldn’t have gone into this with her without making sure she would be safe. Now, you said you two haven’t been using protection. Does that mean no condoms? Or nothing at all? Is she on birth control?”
“Nothing. I told her we’d let nature take its course and if she got pregnant, she got pregnant. She’s it for me, Bull. I want her for not only my old lady but my wife. I want kids as soon as possible with her.”
I could see the others looking at me and listening to us. I didn’t care if they heard my confession. I’d crawl and grovel until she forgave me and took me back. Then I’d spend the rest of my life showing her how much she meant to me and how much I loved her.
Bull laughed. “Believe me, I understand. I was the exact same way when I met Jocelyn. I asked because it could be, she’s pregnant. That can make a woman vomit and faint. Let’s get her back to the compound. I assume you want to drive her back.” I nodded. “Tate, get over here.” Tate came running up to us. He came to transport her in case I couldn’t take her on my bike.
“You okay if Tate rides your bike back to the compound, so you can drive her car and be with her? He came in the SUV with Alex.” I nodded. Tate was the only prospect I would trust with my bike. With this decided, I carried her to the car and got her strapped in the front seat. I hated that she was still unconscious, and I couldn’t hold her in both arms, but the club wasn’t far. I’d backtracked from town to get here. Tate got on my bike and the others got back on theirs. We took off. I tried not to race back. I kept my one arm around her. I’d belted her in the center seat of her 2002 Chevy Impala, so she was leaning against me. As I drove, I thought about what Bull had said. Could it be possible she was already pregnant?
It had only been a month, but we’d been having sex daily and more than once a day. She hadn’t had her period yet. I felt a flicker of excitement at the thought. She might already be carrying my baby. I glanced down at her stomach. It was flat as ever, but I couldn’t help running my hand across it. This made it even more imperative I get her to believe me and come back. I was prepared to do anything, including locking her ass in my room until she came to her senses. I’d tie her ass to the bed if I had to.
As we pulled into the compound, I saw the doc’s car in the lot. Doc Weeks was a friend of Bull’s and the club. Apparently, Bull must have called him. I hurried to get her out of the car and into the clubhouse. I took her straight to my room. Jocelyn and Devyn both gasped when they saw us and stepped toward us, but Bull held them back. Once in my room, Doc closed the door and got out his stethoscope.
“So, Bull said she vomited and then fainted. That you’ve been having sex without using any contraceptives. How long has that been going on?”
“A month. Do you think she could be pregnant already? And if she is, would she be showing symptoms?”
“Oh yeah, she could be pregnant already for sure. Some women start showing symptoms within a few days of conception. Let me finish listening to her and checking out her vitals then we’ll see.” I tried to be patient as he went through his assessment. When he was done, he looked at me.
“Everything seems normal. Bull said she never hit her head. Now, it could just be shock that caused her to vomit and faint, but as soon as she wakes up, I’ll have her take a pregnancy test. It’ll be a urine one, which isn’t as reliable as a blood test, so if the urine one comes up negative, I’ll draw blood to double-check. If she is, then I’ll talk to her about her options.”
I jerked away from the wall I’d been leaning against. “Her options? What the fuck do you mean, her options? You’re not fucking aborting my baby. Get that fucking option out of your head.” My voice must have been really loud because Bull came racing through the door.
“What’s wrong, Rebel?”
“Doc here is talking about Madisen’s options if she’s pregnant. I’m not letting him or anyone else abort my kid!” Doc stood up and held up his hands.
“Rebel, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. Just that if this wasn’t planned, she might need to know her options. Not necessarily an abortion. Adoption is another aspect. As her doctor, I have a responsibility to tell her all of them.”
“Fuck that! She isn’t killing our baby. It’ll be raised by us and no one else. There will be no adoption.”
“Calm down, Reb. He’s just telling us what he has to tell her. We don’t even know if she is pregnant.”
“She’ll want the baby. We talked about letting nature run its course. No way she’d abort or give it up for adoption. No matter how pissed at me she is. Jesus! Can this shit get any more fucked up? Her being pregnant is just going to add to this whole mess?”
“Don’t you worry. If I am, I don’t expect or want anything from you,” I heard Madisen whisper. I looked at the bed to see her glaring at me. I realized how she might have construed my last statement. Fuck! I’d done it again. I went to the bed. Doc and Bull left the room. I crawled onto it with her. She edged away from me, but I wrapped my arms around her and tugged her close.
“Once again, you’re taking things out of context. I didn’t mean you being pregnant complicated us in any other way than you already being mad at me. I fucking want you to be pregnant so bad it hurts. And I’ll be there for my baby every step of the way. He or she will be raised by both parents in a loving home. Before I get Doc to come back and give you a pregnancy test, let’s settle this once and for all. I have never and will never cheat on you. I fucked up in not reacting fast enough with CeeCee. I want you for the rest of my life. I want to raise a family with you. I want to marry you. I love you, Madisen. So much it hurts. Right now, I can barely breathe with you doubting me. Please, baby. Please say you believe me and forgive me for being a dumbass.”
She took her time looking at me and thinking. I was about to hyperventilate. My stomach was churning. Finally, she lifted her hands and took my face between hers. “Ronan, if we do this and I ever get even a hint that you might have been with someone else, I promise you I’ll be gone and I’ll never come back. Do you understand? You need to be sure you’re going to be able to commit to one woman.”