Her face was pale, and I could see her eyes were red from crying. I rubbed my thumb along her cheek. “Baby, why did you leave? Shit, do you know what it did to me to find out what Harley said and then hear you had left. I fucking lost it. Don’t ever do that again or I’ll smack your ass until you can’t sit for a week.”
She snorted. “Nick, I didn’t want to cause a scene at the wedding. I thought it would be best to get out of there and then find my own way back to Hunters Creek. I planned to call you after I got here, but I laid down and fell asleep. I didn’t hear my phone because I had the volume off. I’m sorry I made you worry. But what Harley said isn’t true. I—”
I stopped her. “I know it’s not. You love me like I love you. She’s being a bitch. I heard she said I’d never love a woman after her mom. I don’t know if I told her that when she was younger or not. But I can tell you, I love you more than I ever did Kelly, which I never thought would be possible. Kelly gave me my daughter and a lot of love. She was my first love. You’re my last and deepest love.”
She smiled as she kissed me. Soon we lost all reason. We took off our clothes and made love over and over throughout the night. It was going on five in the morning before we gave up so we could sleep. I texted the guys that we wouldn’t leave until checkout at eleven. I needed some sleep before riding all that way. Maybe we’d stay another night along the way. I’d see what the rest of the crew felt like.
We ended up taking an extra day to get back. Both Devyn and Jocelyn were tired. Dev was battling her morning sickness. I did respond to a text from Terror to let him know Jocelyn was with me. I ignored the ones I got from Harley. I was still too angry to talk to her reasonably.
?????
Jocelyn had two more days off before she had to go back to work on Thursday. Knowing she still dwelled on what was said at the wedding on Saturday, I wanted to keep her busy. We hadn’t gotten the opportunity to put her through the CCW class, so I found one close by. On Tuesday, she and Devyn attended the class. Afterward, the four of us went out to eat.
The construction crew was working on Ace and Devyn’s house. They’d laid out the footers and poured the foundation. They weren’t going to have a basement like mine. We could tell they were excited to see it get started.
On Wednesday while Jocelyn interviewed a possible housecleaner that Bear recommended, I called Terror. He’d texted asking to speak to me. I met the house cleaner before I left to go to the clubhouse. She was in her fifties. Bear had used her when he had a house off the compound. He recommended her when she answered our ad for someone. I knew Jocelyn would be relieved when we found someone. She argued she’d clean the house, but I didn’t want her to spend her time cleaning. She worked, cooked, and spent time with me. I wanted this off her plate before she went back to school, or we had any kids.
I sat down at my desk and took a deep breath before I dialed Terror. He picked up on the second ring. “Hey, Bull. Just checking to see how it’s going with Jocelyn. Is she doing better?”
I sighed. “Maybe. At least she seems better than me. I’m trying to get her to consider taking classes again. She’s adamant she won’t until Devyn’s done. No way I’m going to convince her to let me pay for Devyn’s schooling now. She tried like hell to get me to take back her necklace, earrings, and bracelet. I told her hell no. I couldn’t tell her they match the wedding ring I already bought her.”
Silence met that revelation. “You’ve already bought her a ring?”
“Yep. When I got the other jewelry. I knew within a month of meeting her I wanted to marry that woman. I planned to ask her after getting back from the wedding, but things didn’t turn out like I planned. Now it looks like I’ll need to wait a bit.”
He groaned. “Fuck! Harley did screw things up for you two. If it helps, she’s calmed down. Demon called her and tore her a new asshole over Jocelyn. He yelled for at least an hour. Seeing all the Hunters Creek guys leave, drove home how badly she messed up. She blames herself for ruining everything, which is the truth. I wanted to ask if we could plan to come bring the kids to see you soon. They didn’t get enough time with their pappy. They wanna see you.”
I thought it over. It felt like it was too soon to have them here. “I need to see how Jocelyn’s doing and if she’s willing to have you guys visit soon. If not, then maybe you, me and the kids can meet somewhere so I can see them. I won’t cut them out of my life, Terror, but I will Harley if she can’t accept my life and woman. I never thought I’d ever say something like that. I love Harley, but this hurt both Jocelyn and me like hell.”
“I know. I told her she fucked up. Demon told her. She’s been bawling on and off since then. Then I had to tell the others why you and the Hunters Creek crew left without a word. Suffice to say, things are tense and quieter around here. Everyone wants to see you happy, Bull. I could see Jocelyn makes you happy. I can also see how it would be hard for Harlow to see her dad with another woman, but she barely remembers Kelly. She’ll come around. Let me know when you’re ready for a visit and if you need anything.”
“Thanks, Terror. Give hugs and kisses to the kids. Talk soon.”
I sat there thinking about the call. Was I being too hard on Harley? I didn’t think so. Even if she was thinking those things, she had no right to say it to others in the club and where Jocelyn could hear her. That’s what pissed me off the most. If she had concerns, she should have spoken to me about them.
I was pulled from my thoughts by Jocelyn coming into the office. I was in the one I had at the house. She still looked too pale to me and she was quieter. I opened my arms. She sat on my lap and sank into my arms. “Were you on the phone? I thought I heard you talking,” Jocelyn asked.
“Yeah. It was Terror.” I felt her tense just a little. I kept going. “He called to see how you were doing and asked if he could bring the kids to see me in a few weeks, since I didn’t spend time with them while we were there.”
She sat up and looked at me. “You should go see them, Nick. I don’t want you to miss out on time with them. I’m fine here.”
“I told him I’d think about it. If we don’t do it here, I suggested we meet somewhere in the middle for a few days.”
“Why not at Dublin Falls?”
“I’m not ready to see or forgive Harley for what she did. To be honest, if she keeps this shit up, I may never forgive her. I told Terror that. I guess Demon called her and chewed her ass out.”
“Nick, I don’t want to come between you and your daughter. If you want, have them come here. I can go somewhere for a few days. That way Harley doesn’t have to see me, and you get your time with Hunter and Emerson.”
I tugged her forward until our lips almost met. “I don’t want you to go somewhere else. This is our fucking home. You’re not going to be sent away or hidden like you’re a dirty secret. I love you and Harley either accepts it and makes amends or she doesn’t.”
I could tell she was still worried about my anger. We’d talked, and she’d more than once told me that she didn’t want to mess up my relationships or be a bone of contention. I told her she wasn’t the issue. It gutted me when I woke up the other night and found her awake and crying. She denied it was because of Harley, but I knew it was.
“Let’s see how it goes over the next few weeks. Besides, I don’t want to be away with your attacker and Jonathan on the loose. Speaking of that, we didn’t get a chance to do the trackers in Dublin Falls. I’m going to see when someone can come over and do them. I want you and Devyn to have them just in case.”
“Okay. That’s fine. I’d feel better if Devyn had it too. You just tell me when, honey.” I kissed her. Soon I got lost in her. I was about to suggest we go to our bedroom when my phone rang. “What?” I growled.
“Hey, Pres, it’s Outlaw. I need to see you at the clubhouse as soon as possible.” His voice sounded tense.