When she attempted to put Gabe in his seat, she had to pry his arms from around her neck. He started to cry, but seemed to calm when she told him she was going to ride in the back seat with him.
“He may not understand you,” said Jarrett, “but he responds anyway. I’m afraid he kind of imprinted on you.”
“I still think it’s mostly that he’s more comfortable around women because of his nannies at the orphanage.”
Jarrett grabbed a big stuffed animal from the front seat and handed it to Gabe, who clutched it with both hands. “He really loves this bear Carlie brought over last night. He went to sleep holding it, and it was still in his arms when he woke up, even though it’s almost as big as he is.”
“I’ll be sure to tell her he likes it,” Rylie said, though irritated Carlie evidently hadn’t given Rylie credit for contributing to Gabe’s gifts or advising her what to buy.
“Oh, I already told her. I called her this morning before she flew out to LA.”
“Great. That’s great.” She turned her face away as she walked around the car, hoping he hadn’t seen her annoyance. Why should it bother her that Jarrett and Carlie had talked on the phone that morning? Wasn’t that what she wanted?
Rylie kept Gabe distracted on the way to the hospital, but he began to cry as she carried him through the rotating doors, burying his face against the bear.
“I think he remembers being here yesterday,” said Jarrett. “He didn’t like having blood drawn.”
“I don’t blame him.”
“Me, neither. Bad experiences like that stick with you forever. Just the antiseptic smell alone gets to me every time. Back when I was going to the hospital every week for chemo, I used to throw up on the way there. It was a mental thing.”
“I don’t see how you stood it. I hate getting stuck with needles. I feel so sorry for Gabe.”
“Today, they’ll do surgery to insert his PICC line, so he won’t have to get any more sticks for IVs or blood-draws.”
“Oh! That’s kind of awesome.”
Rylie sat down with Gabe while Jarrett signed in at the surgical desk. But after a few minutes, he waved her over.
“Excuse me a minute.” He stepped away from the desk, pushing his hands through his hair. “I just wanted to warn you the hospital thinks we’re married. Your name’s on all the guardianship papers.”
In fact, theyweremarried, but what would she gain from pointing out the obvious?
“Do we need to get my name off those records somehow?”
“For now, we can’t.” His jaw flexed. “We’ll see what Matthew can do after Wednesday.”
“This is a nightmare, isn’t it? I bet you wish you’d waited until Carlie was well.”
His mouth took on a firm set. “No. We did the right thing. If I’d waited, it would’ve been Tuesday or Wednesday before we even got Gabe back to the States. His pediatric oncologist is already worried we’ve delayed too long, which is why we’re starting treatment today, instead of Monday.”
Once they were in the surgical prep room, the nurse let Gabe sit in Rylie’s lap where she sat on a padded bench, instead of making him lie on the bed. The nurse spoke to Gabe in fluent Spanish, using soothing tones. Smiling shyly, Gabe clutched his bear as the nurse administered a sedative through a nasal spray. Within a few minutes, Rylie felt his body relax in her arms, and he lost his grip on the bear.
The nurse picked it up from the floor and handed it back to him. “What’s your bear’s name?” she asked him in Spanish, interpreting in English for Rylie and Jarrett’s benefit.
Rylie couldn’t understand Gabe’s slurred answer.
“He said the bear’s name isOsito,” the nurse explained, with a chuckle. “That means little bear, although big bear might be a better name.”
Soon Gabe was out cold. Jarrett picked him up and laid him gently on the bed, brushing his hair off his face in a gesture so tender Rylie’s throat tightened. What was it about watching a dad being sweet with his child? It made her fall even harder for him, if that were possible.
Jarrett stood by Gabe’s side speaking soothing words he would never hear, until the orderly came to roll him off to surgery. When the door shut behind him, Jarrett sank onto the bench beside Rylie and slumped forward, elbows on his knees, face in his hands. “I’m a mess, already. I thought this would be easier because I’ve been through it myself. But it’s so hard when it’s a child who doesn’t understand what’s happening.”
On impulse, Rylie laid her hand on his back. When he didn’t flinch, she left it there. The thought occurred to her that if she were truly his wife, this would be a normal action.
“It’s okay to feel stressed. Any father would feel that way. You’re doing a good job not letting Gabe see it.”
“We’re barely even getting started, and we have a long way to go. I don’t know if I can keep it up.”