He releases his hold on Henry, who doesn't seem to notice the tension around him. Henry still possesses the innocence of a child. For as long as possible, I hope that stays true.
The alien holds his hands up in submission. I nearly snort. Yeah, right. “I was merely looking at the rash,” he says calmly. “Is he allergic to anything?”
“Allergic? What happened?” Henry crosses the distance between us, happily babbling and playing with empty bottles he’s crashing into each other like cars. I lift his shirt to see the splotch marks underneath. I’d been so concerned about getting us here and fed, I’d nearly forgotten about the sting he sustained before we got to the tunnels. My heart trips in my chest. There’s no telling what the insects on this planet could have injected him with. He must be so uncomfortable. I should have thought to look for medicine for these, though I was more concerned about the fever at the time. Thinking back, my heart dips. I don’t think there were any allergy tablets with the other medications.
“I know where we can find some histaberramine plants that will help. If he got stung again, the reaction might not be so mild. It would be smart to keep some on hand. I can help you prepare them.”
I consider for a moment, then say, “Fine, alien. Tell me where we can find it and then you can go.” It comes out rougher than I intend, but dammit I’m tired of being cornered with men as my only hope.
He scoffs. “I won't be leaving you here to be eaten by sabrevipes or worse. I can take you to them. And you can call me Galen.”
Before he's even finished speaking, I'm shaking my head. “We're not going anywhere with you, alien. I told you after you helped us, you would have to leave. I appreciate everything you’ve done, but we’re fine now. We don’t need you anymore.”
This seems to take him aback. He swallows hard, looking away for a moment before his gaze returns to me. “And after I help you, I will leave, if that’s what you want.” His tone is implacable. “Your females will never forgive me if I abandon you with your child still ill. Let me do this for you, for Henry.”
I won’t hear a word of it. If I have to go with him, it’ll be on my terms. “No, your assistance won't be needed any further.”
A growl reverberates in his chest. Am I hearing things are his bones popping of their own accord? He swells up to his full height, towering over me and Henry. When he speaks, I get glimpses of his glistening fangs and remember, this man isn’t a man at all. “Female, are you trying to get yourself killed? Those weren't the only beasts in these tunnels who’d take a bite out of you. Those weren't the only threat. There's a war going on or didn't you notice?” As though to punctuate his words, a loud boom comes again from around us.
I think of the other women and hesitate. They’ve done so much for me, protecting Henry from the cruel guards, even if he was the son of an evil soldier. I don't know what they’ve gotten themselves into, but from the sound of it, things aren't going well. A battle between self-preservation and compassion rages inside me. The same battle I thought of when deciding to leave the prison. The same battle that had me running like a coward.
“They'll understand,” I say with resolve I don’t really feel. It wouldn’t be the first time I let them down and I have to put Henry first.
“They are worried about you.” He winces in pain as he settles back against the wall, closing his eyes. “Trust me.”
Trust me. I'd heard those words before. Whispered in the dark, in a honeyed voice. I had trusted them and look where it got me. Because of my weakness, Henry was born into this world. It's my fault he's here on this planet. It's my fault he faces danger every day. I'll spend my life trying to atone for his.
“Then what are you doing here with me? Why aren't you out there with them? If they're in such danger, shouldn't you be helping them?” I spit out the words like I want to spit out the guilt he’s making me feel. Why can’t he just leave us alone? I don’t need a hero when I’m determined to be my own.
If it were possible, his pale skin turns even more ashen. His full lips pull into a frown. “I was helping them until you hailed me on the comms. We don't leave anyone behind.”
Henry tugs on my shirt and presses his face into my side. “Mama be nice. Gawen was nice. He saved us.”