Chapter 23 - Mikah
We returned from Disneyland a few days ago. Today is Sunday. It is the day that Aunt Edith always hosts a large extended family meal at her house. I arrived early. I sent Susana and our son to the market to pick up some of Aunt Edith's favorite flowers as a gift for today. That was just an excuse to get both of them out of the house for a little while. The reason I'm early is that there is something special I have planned. Edith is in on it as well as all of Susana's cousins. In fact they were instrumental in making today possible. That is why it's so important and why I needed to keep Susana away for a while. I really hope nothing happens to spoil today. That would be bad for all of us.
It's a picture perfect Sunday. We could not have asked for more perfect weather for today. Susana texted to say that she is running late. They had to go to a farmers market to buy the flowers instead. That buys me a little more time. I walk into the house and am greeted by Edith and all the cousins. They are busy cooking and setting out food. My anxiety and nervousness is apparent as I stand there. Today is not just another meal, nor a normal sunday. I knew that for a long time. I chose today especially for this.
Today is the day that I am finally going to tell Susana what has been on my mind this entire time. I have been waiting for this day with both anticipation and trepidation. Aunt Edith lays some plates out on the table. She sees my reaction and rolls her eyes. "Get over your nerves already." She advises in a no nonsense tone. "Yeah, don't worry man. We got your back." Susana's cousins say encouragingly. I have to thank them all for today because they all played a part in helping prepare for today. They have known for a while that I was planning to talk to Susana. I'm glad that I brought this up to them first.
When I first told them my plan, they listened and told me how bad it was. After much discussion they helped me plan today's big event. I'm honestly grateful for their help and support. I want today to be absolutely perfect. Thanks to them I know it will be. They know her better than anyone. Hopefully we turned this into a truly memorable day for her.
I can't help but be nervous. Today is such a monumental event. I try to look as calm and unaffected as always, but somehow this makes my nervousness more noticeable. "Oh gosh will you calm down. You need to relax before you faint. Then you won't be able to get a word out." Aunt Edith reprimands me. "You're right….calm…" I mutter to myself. My mind is empty, my brain feels like it is floating in space. I'm such a nervous wreck that I can't seem to get it together. "Oh great!" Aunt Edith sighs in exasperation and walks away in despair.
The food is ready and laid out on the table a short while later. We still proceed with the plan. From the kitchen we hear the front door open. "We're here!" Susana announces. Our son comes running in. "Hey big boy!" I say a little too loudly. Edith gives me a warning glance and I reign my emotions in. Susana walks to her side. "Sorry we are late. We wanted to get you your favorite flowers as a Thank you for this meal and for babysitting." Susana explains. "Oh that's so sweet!" Aunt Edith says hugging her. She takes the flowers and sets them in a vase of water nearby. Afterwards we sit at the table for the meal. Everyone talks and laughs. I do my best to appear as normal as possible. Susana doesn't expect a thing.
After the meal is over everyone crowds into the living room. Our son sits down to watch cartoons with Aunt edith. She is babysitting him for right now. She gives me a glance, which is my cue. "Ready to go?" I ask. "Yes." Susana replies with a gentle smile. We leave the house as if it were our ordinary date night. We go to the nearby lake and stroll around. It is the perfect day for it. The water looks calm and serene. There are lush trees, shrubbery and greenery surrounding it.
All around us families play and take pictures. Everyone seems to be enjoying life. Susana utters a soft sigh that I don't know the reason for. We sit in a shady spot a distance from the water. Everyone is quiet, just enjoying the beauty of life and nature. This is it, the moment has arrived. I take a deep breath and turn to Susana. I clear my throat softly to get her attention. "Susana, there is something that I have been wanting to ask you." I say. I struggle to put my thoughts in order. A small sigh from her interrupts me. "I could tell. But, I want you to know that I have something to tell you as well." She replies. This catches me off guard. Her response was not what I had expected. What are the odds of both of us having something important to say on the same day? I'm going to ruin everything if I don't stay focused. Susana's tone worries me though. What exactly does she have on her mind?