Since breaking things off with Liv, I’ve spent most nights on my couch, thinking about how I should stop thinking about her. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but I didn’t think it would be this hard. Clearly, I’ve either overestimated my ability to move on or underestimated her power over me. It’s more likely the latter.
I take another gulp of my beer and watch the Lakers amazingly lose to the fucking Lebron-less Cavs. “Come on, guys, you’re breaking my heart over here!” I yell to the TV. Well, not really, because my heart is already broken.
But I welcome the pain because I know I’ve hurt Olivia and I deserve to suffer for it. I deserve to feel every ounce of regret, agony, and heartache. I should never have said yes to her in the beginning. Never should have given an inch.
Not when I’ve always known it would end like this.
Suddenly my door bursts open. I jump up, ready to confront whatever hitman Garrett Love has hired. But it’s Olivia, her blonde hair messy, her eyes blazing. She crosses the room, grabs my face and kisses me hard and hungry. I groan, unable to do anything but take it.
Straddling me, she rakes her nails down my neck. “Just one more time, Stephen. I need you one more time. Then I’ll say goodbye.”
I hesitate, but she’s more than I can take. I nod at her splotchy, determined face. “One, then we’re done.”
“I’ll delete your number,” she promises, nipping my ear.
I stand with her legs wrapped around me and devour her mouth, nearly slamming her against the wall to grind against her as I try to memorize the way she tastes. She makes a sound between a whimper and a sob as she bites my bottom lip.
Stumbling up the stairs, I don’t care what I knock over, what scratch marks she’s going to leave on my skin. One last hit. Then a cold-turkey quit. It will be fine. Just one more time is all we need.
I continue lying to myself as I practically tear her dress off her. It flutters to the floor as I toss her onto my king-sized bed. She bites her lip and grabs my tie, dragging me on top of her. “Touch me, Stephen. Don’t stop touching me.”
“Yes.” I stroke the velvety skin of her hip, over her ass, down her thigh. “Just for now. Then we—”
“Shh.” She kisses me softly, but jerks my belt off aggressively.
I kiss across her neck, licking and tasting as I move lower. I savor every inch of her, peeling off her bra to lick and suck her nipples, hard and eager for me. Her back arches and she moans. “You’re so good, Stephen.”
My hand slips between her legs and I tease her against wet silk underwear. “You’re heaven, Olivia. I’m going to—”
“Shut the fuck up.” She rolls me over and pulls her underwear off before sliding down on my cock.
I pant and hold her hips tightly as she rides me. Moonlight catches her hair, and she looks like a nymph as she rides up and down my shaft. Eyes sparkling, hair a fuzzy, glowing halo, lips parted in ecstasy as her body rolls and grinds on mine.
“Beautiful,” I pant.
But I can’t resist taking control, even for a second. I roll her and pin her arms above her head as I nudge her thigh up to fuck her deeper. She’s so wet and tight, and it’s taking work to keep from coming.
I braid my fingers with hers and press my mouth to hers in a kiss I hope she remembers. Her hips meet each thrust until they move erratically. She whimpers, moans, then bites the inside of my shoulder hard as she comes apart in my arms.
Her pussy tightens on me and I come hard, finishing deep inside her. I kiss across her neck and claim her mouth again. She swallows and I notice the tears falling from the corners of her eyes.
She pats my chest and I roll. She gets up, pulls her clothes back on, and gives me a small smile. Handing me her phone, she sighs. “Delete your number. I don’t think I can.”
I swallow the lump in my throat and hit delete before handing it back to her. She nods and wipes at her eyes. “This fucking sucks. I hope you know that. That I’ll keep waiting for you.”
“Don’t, Liv. You need to enjoy your life,” I insist, not trusting myself to get up.
“I enjoy life with you.” She laughs humorlessly, and I hear her voice crack. “Don’t move on too fast, okay? I can’t take that.”
“Be good. Be safe,” I whisper.
She nods and starts to walk out, then hesitates and turns to me. I shake my head. No more kisses. No more sweetness. No moreus. Exhaling, she nods and walks out. The final slam of the door feels more like a nail in a coffin.
Cold turkey starts now.
Olivia
It’s been almost two weeks since I’ve seen Stephen. No one is happier about it than Dad. I’m staying with him for a few weeks while my condo is being renovated, and he likes to “accidentally” leave magazines with nasty articles about Stephen for me to find.