"I wasn't--" Sloane shut his mouth when he realized what Ash had said. In the kitchen, Dex almost choked on his water. He coughed and wheezed. Shit. Sloane took an interest in his boots, ignoring the silence in the room. At least until Ash burst into laughter.
"Holy shit, you didn't? You did! You squirted Daley?"
"Charming." Sloane wrinkled his nose. "It was a long time ago. I was in my Therian form, and we ran into some guy Dex had slept with in college or something. My feral half got a little... carried away, and it just sort of happened." It had not been one of his better moments. God, he'd been mortified after he'd shifted back to Human form, and that was after several hours of Dex coaxing him to shift back.
Seb and Ash exchanged glances before falling into peals of laughter.
Sloane crossed his arms over his chest. "Whatever. Like you two aren't as bad."
Ash waved a hand as he got control of his laughter. "I have never had the urge to piss on Cael."
"Because Cael's a Therian and so is Hudson." Sloane narrowed his eyes at his friends. A thought occurred to him, and he smiled evilly. "Maybe you haven't had the urge to mark your boyfriends that way, but just try and deny that your feral halves haven't had the urge to jump them while you were both in your Therian forms."
The laughter died instantly.
Sloane grinned smugly. "That's what I thought."
Dex gaped at Ash. "Ew, dude, seriously? You want to jump my brother's bones while he's in his cheetah Therian form?"
"I don't. My feral half wants to, and only while I'm in my Therian form. Jesus, Daley, what the hell's wrong with you?" Ash shook his head as if he were trying to get away from the very idea.
Dex shuddered, then gagged. "Oh God, why? Why did you have to tell me that?"
Ash held up a hand. "Hey, in our felid forms, it's perfectly natural. You know our animal instincts are at their strongest when we're in Therian form."
"There's nothing natural about your lion ass humping a fluffy Chirpy."
Ash rolled his eyes. "You're an idiot."
"This conversation has turned incredibly disturbing," Seb said, shaking his head. "Why do things always get weird with you guys?"
Ash pointed to Dex. "That's why."
Seb's expression was pained. "Can we not talk about humping in our feral forms? I would really appreciate that."
The front door opened, and Hudson greeted them cheerfully. His smile quickly faded. "Why does everyone look so... distressed?"
"Because Ash wants to do my brother when he's in his feral form," Dex offered.
Hudson's eyes went huge, and he gaped at Ash. He blinked and was suddenly in doctor mode, his expression turning sympathetic. "That's not uncommon. Many Therians suffer from such conflicting emotions with regard to their feral halves and their partners. Perhaps if you discuss the matter with Cael, and even arrange for some roleplaying, you might--"
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Ash grabbed Hudson's shoulders. "Now you listen here, Doc. I am not going to fuck my boyfriend while he's in his Therian form. I was talking about my Therian half and his Therian half."
Understanding crossed Hudson's features, and he let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, well that is perfectly normal. Every Therian goes through that, especially when a relationship is new."
Dex studied Hudson. "Really? Did Seb ever try to mount you?"
Seb groaned and dropped his head into his hands. "Why are we still talking about this?"
Cael walked in and looked around. "What's going on? What are you guys--"
They all shouted simultaneously, "Nothing!"
Cael started. "Geez, okay. Sorry I asked." He turned his attention to Dex. "Everyone's on their way. ETA five minutes."
Dex nodded, and in all honesty, Sloane was a little relieved they were leaving. Who was he kidding? He was a lot relieved.
"I'll see you guys outside. I just want a quick word with Seb and Ash."