Seb lowered his head, their faces so close he could feel Hudson's breath on his skin. "You make me crazy," Seb murmured, brushing his lips over Hudson's in a butterfly kiss. Hudson parted his lips and angled his face up. He trailed his fingers down to Seb's belt, tucking them between it and Seb's skin, the touch scorching. Was he trying to keep Seb close? Seb leaned in for a kiss as Hudson moved his eyes to meet Seb's. They were glazed, and the tip of his nose rosy. Seb realized he could have Hudson inside the utility closet with his pants around his ankles with very little persuasion. The alcohol would make sure of it. The idea sent a surge of anger through him. He slammed his fist against the wall, startling Hudson.
"I'm sorry," Seb said gruffly, hating that he'd scared Hudson. He tore himself away and thundered out. Dex and Sloane were at the bar. Seb gave Dex a look of warning when Dex opened his mouth. "Hudson's out back. Make sure he gets home. Alone."
Dex didn't ask questions or argue. He quickly headed off toward the back while Seb grabbed his leather jacket from the coatrack by the stairs. He wanted Hudson. Wanted him more than anything, but not like that. Not while he was shitfaced and his defenses were down. If Hudson wanted him, he could damn well do it while he was sober. The last thing either of them needed was more guilt. As it was, Seb couldn't believe he'd dragged Alfie into this. He cursed himself for his stupidity, for lashing out at the man he loved more each day.
"Fuck." He hurried out of Dekatria, into the cool night air, his heart aching. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. What happened to time healing all wounds? It was bullshit, that's what it was. Seb clenched his fists at his sides as he walked. He needed to calm down. A horn blared, and Seb was jerked back as a car flew by. "Shit." What the fuck was wrong with him? He'd walked right into the middle of the road.
"Dude, are you okay?" A guy jogged over. "If that guy hadn't pulled you back...." He shook his head, and Seb raked his fingers through his hair, his heart beating in his ears. He looked around. Aside from the few pedestrians staring with either concern or like he was crazy, the sidewalk was empty.
"Did you see where he went?"
The guy looked around, scratching his head. "He was here like a second ago, and just... disappeared."
Seb didn't blame the guy for not sticking around. Probably thought Seb was some kind of nutcase. "Thanks," Seb said, checking the street this time before crossing. At least someone was looking out for him. He needed to pull himself together and not rely on a guardian angel to save his sorry ass, or he might not be so lucky next time.
HUDSON SLID down the length of the wall, his heartache forming a lump in his throat.
Not a day went by that he didn't think about or miss his brother. Alfie had only been a year older than Hudson, but he'd always been the big brother. He was the only one who looked out for Hudson, took care of him, taught him how to tie his shoes, how not to be scared of his Therian form. Alfie taught him how to be confident in who and what he was. They'd been two peas in a pod. When they were little, they pretended to be Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson, searching for clues and chasing villains. As soon as they turned eighteen, they set off on real adventures, traipsing around Europe until their father's lackeys brought them home. Years later, Alfie still teased Hudson, calling him Watson. Hudson had wanted to be Holmes, but Alfie refused, joking that if anyone was to end up dabbling in questionable substances, it would be him, while Hudson was more likely to end up the respectable doctor.
Their oldest brother, George, busied himself being the perfect heir, and although Theo had been kind, he was the second oldest, with a never-ending list of responsibilities that kept him away. Lewis and Evelyn spent their time going from one posh party to another. They were too concerned with their high-society friends, getting photographed with the right people, and adding to the Colbourn wealth to worry about their little brothers. Their mother, Emilia, spent her time managing Colbourn Cottage, a gothic-style manor built on twenty acres of land in Sevenoaks, Kent, where Hudson and his siblings had been born. It had a very modest seven bedrooms, five reception rooms, four bathrooms, a conservatory, tennis court, and swimming pool. The large staff, steady flow of visitors, and grand parties kept Colbourn Cottage in a constant flurry of activity. Hudson had never felt more alone than he did in his family home. His home had been Alfie, and one day his home was gone.
"Hudson?" Dex knelt beside him, a hand to his shoulder. "Hey, buddy. What happened?"
"It's my fault he's gone," Hudson said quietly, his hands on his drawn-up knees.
"Who? Seb?"
Hudson shook his head. "Alfie."
Dex sat down, his body pressed up against Hudson's, offering comfort. Hudson's inner wolf settled, feeling the warmth coming from his friend.
"Who's Alfie?"
"My brother. You would have liked him." Hudson couldn't help his smile. "He was a cheeky bugger. Always up to some mischief. Quick-witted, so confident and smart. He was charming and handsome too. Wherever he went, he left a trail of admirers. Everyone wanted to be where he was."
"Sounds like quite the guy."
Hudson nodded, tears welling in his eyes once more. "We were inseparable."
"Want to tell me about it?"
Hudson closed his eyes and let his head fall back against the wall. It had been so long since he'd talked about Alfie. Seb was the only one who knew the truth. "I'm afraid you might think less of me."
"Hey. You're my friend. Nothing you say will change that. I know you, Hudson. You're a good man. Whatever it is, you can tell me, but only if you want to." Dex put his hand on Hudson's arm, and Hudson opened his eyes. He rolled his head to look at Dex. The concern and affection in Dex's bright blue eyes eased Hudson's uncertainty.
Hudson pulled in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "My family comes from we
alth. Old money passed down through generations. My great-grandfather was an earl or some such nonsense. I was never interested. Our name and wealth ensured my father never lost his place in society after he and my mother were infected with the virus. Unlike many, they embraced becoming Therian. My father used it to his advantage, boasting how his family had been gifted with an even greater strength. He'd always been an intimidating man, and after becoming Therian, no one dared speak against him.
"I'm the youngest, before me came Alfie, then Millie, Evelyn, Lewis, Theo, and George. All of us born wolf Therians. We became a pack, one my father sought to mold in his image. He wanted our family to become one of the most influential Therian families in England. He believes Therians are superior to Humans. How can they not be? He's one of them after all." Hudson shook his head in disgust. "My father, Dr. Felix Colbourn, was, and still is, a strict man, very set in his ways. No matter what we were, he had certain expectations for all his children, paths he'd chosen for all of us. There was no question of who would do what. Our entire lives were mapped out, from what schools we would attend, to what age we would marry, and who we would marry. Therian of course."
Dex frowned. "That sounds... harsh."
Hudson shrugged. "It was expected. My brothers and sisters fell into line, eager to please my parents and make them proud. They wanted the money and prestige. Alfie and I, we didn't want our lives dictated. We couldn't understand why it was so important to them. Everything had to be perfect. As the youngest, I was spoiled. Given everything I asked for. It was easier to placate me than spend the effort required to understand me. Whatever my siblings wanted, Alfie and I wanted the opposite, at times simply out of spite. We rebelled all through our youth. In our teens, we were always getting into trouble. We wanted to see how far we could push everyone.
"My father decided Alfie and I would pursue a career in cardiology, but from a young age, we'd been fascinated by forensic science, the way puzzle pieces are discovered and examined to form a bigger picture. We wanted to help those no longer capable of helping themselves, and perhaps bring peace to those left behind. The THIRDS caught our interest, and when I brought it up at dinner one evening, my father was absolutely livid."
"Why? The THIRDS is an elite worldwide organization that does great things."