Cael shook his head. “That’s very sweet, but it’s not. I’d like it if we could pretend this never happened and just move on.”
“Cael—”
“Please, Ash. I’m feeling a little humiliated right now, so please, don’t make it worse.”
Ash swallowed hard and nodded. “It’s forgotten.”
“Thank you. Good night.” Cael turned and disappeared upstairs.
It took several seconds before Ash could get himself to move from where he stood. He walked back to the couch and sat down. Damn it. Everything had been going so well. All he’d wanted was to watch some TV with Cael and maybe fall asleep together, something they’d done countless times over the years. God, he was such an asshole. Cael had put himself out there, taken a chance, and he’d made the guy feel like shit for it. The worst part was that he’d wanted it. He’d wanted Cael so bad it hurt. And then his fucking brain had to mess things up by panicking. They were safe. This was Cael’s childhood home. The only people here were family. It wasn’t like they were going to have sex. At least he was pretty sure Cael had no intention of having sex on his dad’s couch, but even with that in mind, Ash couldn’t bring himself to give in.
With a sigh, he turned off the TV and lay down, then pulled the covers up to his chin. There was nothing that could be done about it now. He’d promised Cael he’d forget about it, and he would. Thank fuck this night was over. He c
losed his eyes when he thought he heard a faint cry. Instinctively, his thoughts went to Cael, and he sat up, listening. He heard another cry, this one a little louder. He got up and went to the stairs. Halfway up, he heard it clear as day.
“Oh fuck. Fuck. Please, Sloane.”
You have got to be fucking kidding me! Ash hurried down the stairs. He reached the bottom and stepped on his pajama pant leg, nearly tripping and colliding with the floor. He managed to regain his balance and stomped over to the couch, where he got under the covers. With a grunt, he rolled over, taking his pillow with him in the hopes of drowning out the sex noises coming from upstairs. Just icing on the fucking cake. The last thing he needed was to hear his best friend and that menace fucking. He should have known this night could get worse. It was clearly a punishment for what had happened with Cael. He shut his eyes tight, but he could still fucking hear them. How fucking loud could one guy be? Very, apparently.
“Goddamn it!” Did those two have no shame? How did Maddock not get up and kick Dex’s ass? Could he not hear them? He had to hear them. Why didn’t Cael tell his brother to shut the fuck up? After gathering the blankets and pillow, Ash headed for the basement. Fuck it. He’d sleep downstairs in Maddock’s office. Earlier, when he’d changed, he’d seen a couch down there.
He grabbed the cushions off the couch in Maddock’s office, which was too small for him to sleep on, and he chucked them on the carpeted floor. He was so going to kick Dex’s ass tomorrow. He readied his makeshift bed and lay down. He’d slept on worse. With a grumble, he closed his eyes and prayed Christmas wouldn’t be such a fucking disaster.
Chapter 4
THANKSGIVING HAD come and gone, leaving Ash with mixed feelings about spending Christmas with Cael. He’d had a great time until his spectacular fuckup at the end of the night. Maddock, Dex, and Sloane knew about them, so why hadn’t he been able to relax? If he couldn’t get himself to feel comfortable with Cael in front of family, how the hell would he be able to do so out in the open? This wasn’t how he wanted things to go with them. He’d barely slept that night, thinking about how he’d hurt Cael, about how he was letting the most wonderful thing to ever happen to him slip through his fingers, all because he couldn’t get his head out of his ass.
The next morning at breakfast, while Ash had been more miserable than ever, Cael had been his usual sweet, chipper self. Ash saw through the façade. Cael was hurting. Ash’s rejection had stung. Even so, Cael had served Ash breakfast and brought him coffee just the way he liked it. He’d smiled warmly and even hugged Ash when he and Sloane said their good-byes.
Now Ash stood outside Shultzon’s house with Dex, and he was in a foul mood. If it wasn’t for Sloane, he wouldn’t even be here. He was glad his best friend had received some kind of closure from having chatted with Shultzon, but Ash had no desire to see the doctor. Not after he’d spent most of his life trying to forget what he’d suffered at the hands of this man, at least until Isaac Pearce had brought it all crashing back by kidnapping Dex and taking him to the research facility. Again Ash had compartmentalized and closed the doors for good on memories and information that were of no use to him. His THIRDS-appointed therapist said it wasn’t healthy. Fuck that. It kept him functioning.
Silence snapped him out of his trance. Dex had been quiet the entire ride over. It was freaky. Lord knew the guy never shut up, which was why when he did, it felt wrong. Was Ash actually getting used to having Dex around? Thankfully the door opened, stopping any more ludicrous thoughts from entering his mind. Ash had called the doctor while Sloane was at his therapy appointment for his leg, and they’d been in luck. The guy was home and invited them over for a chat.
“Ash, how wonderful to see you.” He held his hand out, and Ash reluctantly shook it. With a bright smile, Shultzon turned to Dex. “Agent Daley, what an absolute pleasure to meet you. I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you.”
Dex shook the man’s hand, his jaw clenched so tight Ash was afraid he might break something. “Thank you.”
“Please, come in.”
Shultzon motioned for them to enter, and Dex did. Ash followed. The doctor led them into a neat and elegant living room and showed them over to a large couch.
“Can I get you both some coffee?”
Before Ash could answer, Dex answered for them. “No, thank you. This won’t take long.”
Daley sporting an attitude and refusing coffee? That was weird. Dex was usually all smiles and charm, even when dealing with someone he didn’t trust, especially when dealing with someone he didn’t trust. He knew how to get under their skin, gather intel without them knowing what he was doing. Ash was always able to spot the intensity behind the pale blue eyes, despite the smile. It wasn’t the same smile Dex had for Sloane, his family, or even his friends. Ash had seen it enough to know the difference. Dex was a complicated man with many faces. He was an expert at playing oblivious and a master of evasive tactics. Ash was starting to see through the class clown façade hiding a potentially dangerous man.
Shultzon took a seat in the armchair across from them. “Is Sloane all right?”
“Why wouldn’t he be?” Ash asked, wondering how much Shultzon knew about what had happened the last few months. Sloane had told him how Shultzon was still connected to the THIRDS, working for them in the Therian youth centers. Was he still helping them recruit? He’d told Sloane he liked to know what was going on around him, but how much was he involved?
“Well, you’re both here without him. His lover and best friend.”
“He had an appointment,” Dex replied somberly.
“Right. For his leg. How is he?”
Ash studied the doctor. “How’d you know it was for his leg?”