“Tell me anyhow. Please.”
Even Luca’s voice had the same calm Koda’s had. Crying, afraid, and somehow soothing. The turmoil raging in Nox quieted, and some tension left his muscles.
“It was after I woke up. After they…”
The surge of energy carried a cold static as it boiled through his veins. At first a high and then the panic from the realization he was no longer his own being.
“After they brought me back. I was strapped down. The Anubis, it takes over. Death is the doorway.”
Luca stopped moving.
“I was killed by a shot to the chest. Long-range sniper.” Nox touched the wad of scar tissue on his chest over his heart.
Luca wiped his tears with the hem of his shirt.
“I died, and they used Koda to bring me back.”
“How?”
“They used the Anubis they’d put inside him.” Nox shook his head. “We shared his death, he gave us life.”
Luca’s eyebrows came together.
“We were his betas.” Nox licked his lips. “We needed him to keep us stable. And now that he’s gone? I’m not safe. If I Phase out, I’ll become the Anubis and won’t come back.”
“People don’t turn into monsters.”
Nox wished it were true. “You saw the monsters at your house; you saw me just now.”
“But you were you.”
“No, I wasn’t. I looked like me, but you know it wasn’t. You felt it. You heard it. The only reason I didn’t change…” The only reason he didn’t do all those wonderful things. Nox fought to reign in his thoughts. “I died, Luca. Everything I was died. I don’t know what I am now.” The idea he may never know terrified him.
*****