Nox concentrated on stripping off the wet garments and dressing Luca as fast as he could without jostling him too much while stealing glances at their surroundings.
When he had Luca in dry clothes, he got back behind the wheel and felt around for the ignition wires. The engine rumbled to life, and Nox turned the Jeep around.
This was what he’d feared. Luca seeing him. Not in the shape of the creature, but as the monster. And now that he had?
No, Luca would never look at him the same.
But Nox didn’t deserve for him to.
Nox’s vision wavered until the tears in his eyes broke free. He scrubbed them off his cheeks but more threatened to fall.
A cool touch ghosted Nox’s thigh.
“I didn’t mean to upset you.” Luca continued to pet Nox.
Nox didn’t mean to laugh. Upset him? Yeah, the things Luca said eviscerated Nox, but not because they came from Luca, but because everything he’d said was true.
Luca sat up a little. Already the blossoming bruises across his face had yellowed.
At least he would physically heal.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t believe you when you said what it—the Anubis—was like. I mean, I did but….”
“If I could change it, I would.”
Luca nodded.
“Drink more juice, please.”
He did and was even able to return the bottle to the cupholder. Luca folded his trembling hands in his lap.
“What about you?” Luca said.
What about him? Nox followed his stare. Dash lights traced the lines and gouges of angry pink flesh where he’d healed, but not completely. “I’ll be okay. My reserves are low. I’ll just take longer to heal for a while until I get some food and rest.” Nox turned up the heat. “I’ll find a motel and rent a couple of rooms.” Although Nox had no idea how he would survive with a wall between them.
“You don’t want to stay with me?”
Nox tightened his grip on the wheel until the skin over his knuckles threatened to split. “I can’t trust myself.”
“You mean you can’t trust it.”
“Yeah.” Now more than ever, the Anubis wanted Luca. As if the violence it displayed had been an attempt to impress him. And now it wanted to reap the rewards of its efforts.
“What if I don’t care?”
“I’m not strong enough to keep fighting it, Luca.”
“Then don’t.”
Nox glanced at Luca. The bruises on his face seemed to have stopped healing. He needed more food. Fats. Proteins.
Or Nox could just pull over and wrap himself around Luca. The Anubis threatened to surface.
Luca reached out. His movements staggered by passing milliseconds, the action traveling down Nox’s nerves as if it were his hand coming closer and not Luca’s. There was no mistaking the worry as Luca’s: it held too much warmth, too much kindness.
“Don’t.” Nox said it louder than he meant to, and Luca flinched. “Don’t touch me. Not, right now. Please, Luca. Please—”
“I’m still not afraid of it.”