I nod, because I do, even though four fingers straight up inside me is enough to hurt. I want him enough that I want it too.
“Say it.”
I look at him onscreen. He’s got his cock in his hand now. The sight gives me a rush of tingles.
“I love being a good slut for you.”
My words sound hollow and far away, but my fingers are already playing. The cava makes me heady in the best of ways, and the way I’m fucking myself starts to feel good.
“You’re gonna take dirty guy’s cocks right there for me, aren’t you? In your mouth, and your cunt, and your ass… all three fucking holes at once.”
“Yes,” I whisper, my mouth watering at the way he jerks his cock.
“How many guys will you fuck for me?”
The rhythm is working on my clit as I play on the sticky rubber sheets. Seeing Ant so wound up and horny is enough to have me wet and desperate. I don’t care where I am anymore, or how I look in a room full of cameras, or how much cock he wants me to take for him. All I want is for him to want me like he does right now.
His dirty smirk is magical. The way he works his cock so hard drives me wild.
I come for him and let the waves take over me, telling him I’m going to be his slut and fuck as many guys as he tells me to, and it feels filthy, but I want it. I want to make him proud.
He grunts as he comes, telling me what a hot, horny bitch I am and how he can’t get enough of me. How he can’t wait to get home to me. How I’m all he’s got on his mind.
We both catch our breath together, and he’s staring at me with utter devotion, just like I’m staring at him.
“That was absolutely beautiful,” he whispers. “I never thought I’d find someone who makes me feel like you do. You’re a goddess, Cass. A fucking goddess.”
We’re still on the phone when I shower, and the mood shifts in the most light hearted of ways. I wrap myself up in his dressing gown and go back to the kitchen, opting for orange juice and not more cava as we chat. We talk about our next movie afternoon and where I want to go out for dinner, and how he can’t wait to hold me in his arms and squeeze me tight.
I debate inviting him down to Bucklebury with me for Harry’s birthday, but hold back, thinking it would be better to ask him in person. It seems quite a big thing to spring on someone – hey, want to come meet my family for a weekend – when we’re still only just finding out what each other likes for dinner, but I guess it’s nothing compared to giving me a house key, so I take a breath.
“My nephew’s birthday party is coming up, the weekend after next.”
As it turns out, I don’t even need to ask Ant about accompanying me. He replies before I get the chance.
“Fantastic. How would you feel if I came with you?”
I grin at him. “That would be amazing.”
“Excellent! Do we need a hotel room, or are we ok to stay with your family?”
I buzz at the thought of him sharing my parents’ spare bedroom with me.
“We’ll be able to stay with Mum and Dad. We’ll just have to make sure we don’t bash the headboard against their wall at night.”
He laughs. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure we’re quiet.”
There is no doubt left when he kisses the screen and says goodnight. Ant is the man for me. I just pray to God I can keep him.
I never wanted Jack anywhere near the way I want Ant. I never thought about Jack the way I think about Ant. I never felt so excited about a future with Jack the way I feel about a future with Ant.
I’m almost asleep when my phone buzzes with a message. I take it off the bedside cabinet through cava bleary eyes, trying to register the words.
There’ll be some presents arriving for you tomorrow. I hope you enjoy them xx
I have no idea what they’ll be, but the thought makes me grin. He’s the most generous guy I’ve ever known.
Thanks. I’m so spoiled xx
I’m smiling to myself when I get the next message. Three words, texted casually, like it’s the most natural expression in the world.
Love you, baby.
I stare at it for over a minute straight, trying to believe he’s sent that to me. Does he? Does he really?
I picture his eyes and his smile, and trust he’s telling the truth.
With my heart racing, I type out my reply and press send.
I love you, too.
The drive to work is longer from Ant’s house than Newton Road, but I love the descent into Malvern.