We named our little girl together – Rosaleigh May Rhodes – as a symbol of what it means to be the ray of light in your storm. Rosaleigh May was Gerwyn’s auntie. The one person in the storm of his world who believed him when nobody else was there. And now Gerwyn will always be there for our Rosaleigh May, just like I will. Our little girl deserves a name like that, and Gerwyn’s aunt deserves such a wonderful little soul in her memory.
This right now is truly what fairy tales are made of. Rosaleigh in her daddy’s arms as he’s wearing his wedding tux. Me in my white dress, full of love.
And next comes Bucklebury Hall and the cutting of the cake as Gerwyn and I laugh together, both of us keen to share the first slice.
Caramel crème. Our favourite. It was a no brainer. We high fived and did a jig around the kitchen once we’d placed the order.
We’re already munching on a second slice between us as the speeches start.
My dad tells our guests how happy he is that Gerwyn is my husband, and how proud he is of me as both a mother and a daughter, as well as a wife. I’ve pictured it so many times, but never like this, as powerful as it is in person.
Richard Wells tells the room how much of an honour it is to be Gerwyn’s best man as well as working alongside him, and how incredible it’s been to see Gerwyn so happy at my side. How he is an incredible man who is worth an incredible woman on his arm, and I’m that woman.
My self-esteem is higher than I’ve ever known it, so polar opposite to the way Ant was peeling it away from me, one tiny piece at a time. And the one person who’s helped raise me from the depths more than any other is the one who stands next to address the room.
It’s my husband’s turn. The crusader.
He stands up at the head table like it’s a podium, with fire in his eyes along with the huge smile on his face. He takes my hand and squeezes, and my heart soars for the beautiful man that he is.
He tells them how he wasn’t sure he’d ever get the lurch in his stomach of being in love with someone again, not until the moment he was in his prince outfit after we’d been laughing over pizza. He tells the room how much fun it was with me, right from the very start, but how there was a lot more to it than that. An unspoken connection. A truth and a respect that nothing will ever change, and love that will last for all time. So many amazing days, and nights chatting until the dawn, as well as special moments non-stop with our little girl, and how he wouldn’t change any of them for the world.
I love you, Cass, he tells me. I’m so honoured you’re my wife.
I clutch his hand with a me, too, and the room raises a glass to us. Mr and Mrs Rhodes.
I look at the wedding ring on my finger, and still can’t believe it. This is my wedding day. I’m the one living the dream.
I’m the highest I could ever be… or so I thought until the first dance comes.
Time for some dirty dancing… but this time there’s no monster on the sidelines to ruin the magic.
The song starts up and Gerwyn becomes Patrick and I become Jennifer, both of us still caught up with enough humour that we’re laughing together as he spins me around. But this time there is love, too. Love and passion, and enough of the vampire in him that it gives me tingles. A great combination.
People have joined us on the dance floor by the time the song climax comes.
“Do it…” Gerwyn says, and I laugh so loud over the music.
“I can’t!” I’m so damn nervous. And I’m still in my wedding dress.
“Come on!” he laughs back, “I promise I’ll catch you.”
Of course he will. He’ll always catch me. His words have me grinning and I’m soon taking a few steps back for the run up.
I give him a nod and the whole room is fixed on us.
I run to him like a lovestruck idiot, with a one, two, threeee… and I leap into the air and he catches me tight, lifts me high and steady. I spread my arms wide and he holds me there as the crowd cheers, and we’re still laughing amateurs, but it works ok. I don’t dive headfirst into the wedding cake. Not in those two seconds, at least.
Gerwyn and I are in hysterics when he drops me back to the floor, still dancing tight in each other’s arms, and I wish I could go back in time and give myself a hug in the Malvern living room, telling myself not to worry, and that the crusader would always be at my side, no matter what.