There’s a horrible feeling of heaviness unfolding, as though a very, very thick rug is being pulled away from the surface of Anthony Bradstone.
The easy option for me would be to cut ties and head down to London. I could stay with Richard from G.A.T.A. and start over again like I did when I moved to Germany as a costumed prince, but I can’t do that. I can’t leave Cass in Ant’s grip without knowing with absolute certainty that she wants to be in it, on his terms every step of the way, because that’s all he’s ever prepared to offer.
His road, or the high road.
If only I’d have seen it sooner.
Ant can’t know that I have the key to Cass’s apartment, as there’s no way he’d let me be in it. I head back there with my new laptop, creating a login and connecting to her Wi-Fi. I’m blocked from every aspect of her social media, and she shows up in no searches whatsoever that would grant me access, so thank fuck she wrote down her private email address. I’d have used it a lot sooner if I’d have known what was coming.
I dig out the notebook she gave me, flicking through the pages until I find her scrawl, then call up a message window, ready to go.
Cass, it’s Gerwyn. Please let me know you’re ok. Whatever Ant has told you about my involvement with fraud is nothing but lies. There’s no truth in any of it. Please believe me and let me explain myself before you cut ties.
I consider calling in at Wedding Bliss next and reaching out via Janie, but I don’t want to drag her into the battle, since it will only turn Ant against her. My crusader side is in full swing, and it’s driven by something almost primal in its instincts… driven by what? Morals? Ethics? Love? I don’t even know, but it’s a heady combination. I flick through the rest of Cass’s notebook, looking for more contact information… other email addresses that might reach her, or appointments she might still be attending… any possible way I can contact her and make sure she’s doing ok.
And then I have it. A scrawl just a few pages earlier, scribbled down just as shakily on the page. I remember it now. Cass’s frantic phone call to me in Berlin, after an unexpected conversation on their landline.
Ant’s mum, the scrawl says, with a number listed underneath, barely legible.
For so long I’ve dismissed Ant’s mother as nothing more than an evil bitch who discarded him, treating him like shit every day, and maybe she is. Maybe it’s exactly the way he painted it, but I doubt that’s exactly the case anymore.
My heart is pounding as I key her number into my new phone. I have my eyes closed as the number connects, praying she answers.
I’ve almost given up when a voice sounds out.
“Hello?”
“Callie-Ann?”
“Yeah, who’s speaking?” She pauses. “Ant? Ant? Is that you?!”
I can hear the hope in her voice, even in those few little words. I feel like a piece of shit when I have to reveal that it’s not.
“No, I’m sorry. It’s not Ant. I’m calling you about him, though. I work with him, actually. My name is Gerwyn.”
Shit. Worked. I worked with him. It’s going to take a while before I start speaking in the past tense about that situation. It gives me a kick in the guts.
“Will he speak to me?” she asks. “Is that why you’re calling? Because he’ll speak to me?”
Again, such fragile hope in her words.
“He hasn’t said that, no, sorry, but I’d like to speak with you myself, if I may?”
She goes silent on the line, so I have to prompt her.
“Callie-Ann, I’d really like to meet up with you, to talk about your son. May I do that, please? I really need to ask you some questions. I’ve lived with Ant for over three years, and there are some things I need to know.”
“You’ve lived with him? With Ant? In Malvern?”
“Yes. I’ve lived with him. In Berlin as well as in Malvern.”
“And how about his girlfriend? Do you live with her too?”
“With Cass, yes. I’ve lived with her recently.”
“Cass…” she pauses. “And is she really his girlfriend girlfriend, like she said?”
“His girlfriend girlfriend?”
“Yeah. His girlfriend girlfriend. Not one of his… other girlfriends, you know.”
No. I don’t know, but now isn’t the time to push it.
“Cass is a serious girlfriend of Ant’s, if that’s what you mean,” I tell her. “In fact, they are recently engaged.”
I try to gauge her reaction, and it’s quite a strong one. She breaks down in sobs, and I’m not sure whether they are happy or sad ones, but the news has taken her by surprise.
I have to wait a while before she’s capable of speaking again, but seize the moment as soon as I can.