Yet again, I don’t say a thing. The words won’t come.
“Thanks,” I say. “He’s really something.”
“You are crazy lucky,” she tells me. “You deserve it though, Cass. You deserve it. I never thought I’d say this but I’m actually happy for you that Jack fucked off with Susie now.”
We laugh together at that, because it’s so unreal.
The crowd are getting ready to go back to Mum and Dad’s when we return to the table, but once we get outside the pub Ant lets out a yawn.
“Sorry, everyone,” he says. “I’m sure I’ll wake up in a bit, it’s just been a long day.”
People pick up on his gesture in an instant, and Michelle agrees that it’s been a long day and Tommy will be tired, too. Sarah and Dave follow her sentiment and say Harry needs his bedtime as well, and so it goes.
Michelle leaves with Stephen and Tommy, with a goodbye and don’t you dare leave it so long next time! Sarah, Dave and Harry leave us to head off back to theirs, and it’s just Mum and Dad along with us as Ant drives back to their house.
“I really am exhausted,” he repeats when we’re back inside, and Mum and Dad agree with him, both of them giving us another hug as we say our goodnights.
Ant grabs mineral waters as expected, but my head is still a little bit fuzzy when we get up to my bedroom. I sit on the edge of the bed but Ant doesn’t join me, just takes off his tux in silence.
“That was amazing, thank you,” I say, and he smiles but he doesn’t mean it. I know what his mind is on, so I guess I’m coming to read him a little bit by now, at least.
“I really don’t think Jack cheated on me, Ant. It was actually nice to see him with Susie tonight. I’m glad they’re happy.”
He doesn’t speak, just shrugs.
“Honestly, Ant. Jack’s a nice guy, he just fell for someone else.”
“A nice guy, is he?”
“Yeah. He’s nice. You’d probably like him if you got to know him.”
He flashes me a spiky glance at that. His voice is an angry whisper.
“I won’t be getting to know the cunt. He’s a pathetic piece of shit and he looks like one. I can’t believe that’s the absolute cock you’ve got a tattoo about. Jesus Christ, Cass. What the fuck did you ever see in him?”
I feel bizarrely protective of Jack at that. It’s one thing Sarah saying it, since she’s known him for years, but Ant’s only spoken to him for twenty seconds tops. In fact, he didn’t speak to him at all. He didn’t say a word.
I don’t want to argue, so I don’t, just get changed out of my dress, making sure to hang it up nicely on the hanger.
I’m ready to get my PJs on when Ant grabs my arm.
“Say it, Cass. Say he’s a pathetic, cheating piece of shit. Accept the truth.”
I get a flash of fire of my own.
“No, Ant. Because he’s not. That’s not the truth.”
“I’ve told you what the truth is when it comes to cheating. He cheated on you.”
I shake my head this time, and the fire won’t go from me.
“Jack didn’t cheat on me, and even if he did, what does it matter now? I’m with you and happier than he ever made me. I’m happy for him and Susie. Everyone’s happy. Everyone wins.”
That’s when he pulls my arm up and unclips my bracelet.
“It matters now, Cass, because it’s that cunt whose memory you’ve got tattooed on your fucking skin.”
I pull my hand back. “So? It’s from the past.”
“It matters because I’m not putting a wedding ring on your finger with that cunt’s memory on your arm.”
“What?” I ask him, letting out a hint of a sigh, because it sounds so over the top to me.
He carries on, though. “I’m not marrying you with a tattoo about your cheating cunt of an ex on your arm, Cass. You can forget that.”
I stare at him in shock.
“What do you want me to do about it, then?” I’m surprised by the strength in my words. “Get it taken off with a magic eraser? Tattoos don’t exactly work like that, Ant.”
“No,” my fiancé says, as cold as ice. “You’ll get that horrific piece of shit covered up with a tattoo about me.”
Cass
It’s always sad hugging Mum and Dad goodbye, but this time when I say I’ll see them soon I mean it. I’m going to take every opportunity to spend time with them now that I’ve handed in my resignation. Being back here this weekend has only reinforced how I’ve missed them all so much.
Ant looks like a suited god on a Sunday morning as he gives them a hug goodbye after me, thanking them very much for having us.