Something in his face closed then, as if a gate had suddenly been lowered between them. The easy, sexy mood of a moment before was destroyed, and she was to blame.
The really crazy part was that she had known, even as the words tumbled like toads from her mouth, that she wasn’t being honest.
Something inside her—that secret inner voice that whispered below the radar of her self-imposed censorship—had come alive at his words. Yes, it had breathed. I’ve been waiting for you. Tell me more…
At the time, she’d been too confused by her own conflicting feelings to do or say anything that might have salvaged the situation. The damage had been done. Hayden had made his excuses soon thereafter, leaving her frustrated and furious with herself.
Now, as she regarded the handsome man across the breakfast table, she wondered how she could bring back that spark without making herself too vulnerable in the process. Snippets from his phone conversation of a few moments before replayed in her mind, adding a dark, mysterious element to the mix. Was there a connection between his remark at the happy hour and whatever the hell it was she’d overheard?
Restrain her…needle play…ropes, chains, submission…
As at the happy hour, his provocative words, though clearly not meant for her ears, had instantly penetrated her defenses, making her heart race and her nipples tingle. This was her chance to make it right. Or at least to open the door again…
Before she could talk herself out of it, Dahlia blurted, “I heard you, you know. Just now, I mean. I heard what you were saying. Based on your comment the other night, I’m guessing that wasn’t some kind of medieval medical treatment you were discussing.”
She held her breath in anticipation of his response. Was she ready for his answer, whatever it might be? Would he be angry that she’d eavesdropped on his private conversation?
When he didn’t respond right away, she lifted her water bottle to her lips to hide her embarrassment, flustered to see her hand was shaking. She put down the bottle, gripping her hands in her lap as she struggled for control.
When she raised her eyes to his face, she was startled to see he didn’t look upset or the slightest bit self-conscious, or concerned he’d been overheard. Instead, he lifted one brow, an ironic smile ghosting his lips. “Curious about the sexist caveman’s private conversation?”
She winced at the reminder.
“Be careful, little girl,” he added teasingly, though she sensed the steel beneath his words. “You really shouldn’t ask questions you don’t actually want answered.”
“Little girl?” she countered. She’d meant for a sassy retort, but the quaver in her voice gave her away. Swallowing hard, she pushed on, “I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to know.”
His eyes slid down to her chest, lingering there for an insolent moment before returning lazily to her face. Her nipples, taut now to the point of throbbing, had to be visible beneath her scrubs. She clenched her hands, refusing to give him the satisfaction of covering herself as she tried to maintain a calm, confident gaze.
He regarded her for a long moment. Something in his gaze sent a shiver of raw desire directly to her sex.
She drew in a deep breath, determined to plow on. Now that she’d taken this step, no way was she going to retreat. She managed an answering grin. “It’s okay, Hayden. I get it if you’re embarrassed and uncomfortable about your, uh, kink.”
“Not at all. I’m just a little surprised, frankly, that you’re interested, after Friday night.”
His words hit home, despite his teasing tone. Why was she being so flippant? She needed to drop the sarcasm if she wanted an honest answer.
She looked down at the table. “About that. I want to apologize. I think I was just so taken by surprise that I resorted to snark. Your comment startled me.”
It had done a whole lot more than that. She bit her lower lip, determined to be more honest. Lifting her head, she met his eye. “Then, overhearing that snippet of conversation about…whatever it was about… I was intrigued by what you said because it touched something in me. I…I sometimes have fantasies…”
Oh god. Why was this so hard? Just say it already.
“The thought of a strong guy—an alpha guy taking what he wants sexually—that turns me on.” Suddenly afraid she’d revealed too much, she added quickly, “Academically speaking, of course.”
Hayden’s eyebrows rose high on his forehead, his lips quirking in a sardonic smile. “You give with one hand and take with the other,” he teased. “Okay, then, Dr. Simon. In the interest of academics, if you’re sure you want to know what I was discussing in my private conversation…”
Fighting down the blush that tried to invade her face, Dahlia replied, “Yes. I do. Please.”
“Okay then. Full disclosure. I’m into something called BDSM. The acronym stands for bondage, discipline or dominance, sadism or submission and masochism.”