“Not like you, lad,” Gillie piped up around a mouthful. “Have you been to the drachmsmith’s chamber yet?”
I perked up at that. “What? No. Where is it?”
Gillie chuckled. “Basement level. If you reach the dungeon, you’ve gone too far.”
I went pale.
“Dungeon?” My eyes darted to Nua. “Is there anyone in it?”
He shook his head and gave me a smile. “No. Don’t worry, Ash.”
I nodded and looked over at Lonan, who was quietly eating.
“Does your mother’s palace have a dungeon?” I asked without thinking, then immediately went hot all over when he stiffened. My branch hand shot over to grip his wrist. “I’m sorry—”
“It’s fine.” He smiled at me. “And yes. It does.”
I dropped the subject, grateful when Nua started talking about the preparations for the coronation, which had already shifted into high gear since this morning.
I glanced surreptitiously over at Lonan, worried I’d upset him. But he looked fine and was still eating. When he noticed me looking, he reached under the table to squeeze my knee.
“Stop worrying,” he murmured as Gillie fussed over Nua, piling more food onto his plate. “You don’t have to be careful with your words with me, Ash.”
I unclenched just a little. “Okay. Sorry. I just didn’t know if… mentioning her would upset you.”
He snorted. “She has always been vile. Maybe her tearing my leg off should upset me but… honestly, I expected worse.”
I stared at him as he started eating again. Swallowing around the lump in my throat, I quickly looked down at my plate to try and hide how devastated his words made me.
The Brid had been awful, but I’d spent barely any time at all with her. I’d had an amazing childhood with my dad and Mags.
Lonan had only ever had the Carlin. He never mentioned his father, but I assumed he hadn’t been around. And I knew that Lonan’s childhood had been terrible—lonely and filled with pain. He had the scars to prove it.
I wished we were in our room, alone, so I could wrap him in my arms and hold him tight. I didn’t think he really understood how horrifying his words were—that he’d actually expected his mother to do worse to him thanrip his fucking leg off. But he’d never known anything else.
“Do you want more?” he asked me as he leaned forward to get more lamb and salad.
My lips quirked, and I shook my head. “I don’t know how you don’t pass out in a food coma every night.”
“Food coma?” he asked as he speared some meat on his fork.
I chuckled and started eating again. By the time we all finished our dessert—rhubarb and ginger crème brûlée—Gillie was half drunk and trying to tell a vulgar joke about a solitary fae who wandered into a kelpie’s lake. Nua laughed as he dragged him up out of his seat and said goodnight.
“Shall we go find your new drachmsmith chamber?” Lonan asked as we stood up from the table.
I laughed and took his hand to lead him into the hall. It took us a while to find the tucked-away staircase that led down into the darker part of the palace. The air got colder and damper as we descended, but a few torches had been lit along the walls.
The moment we reached the stone floor of the lower level, I turned and wrapped my arms around Lonan. He stilled in surprise, then let out a chuckle as he stroked a hand down my back and kissed my neck.
“Are you alright?”
I nodded, pressing my nose into the bend of his neck to breathe in his scent. “I just love you.”
Lonan’s fingers tightened on my back, before he wrapped both arms around me and pulled me closer.
“I love you too.” His voice was a little hoarse, and he nuzzled his nose into my hair. “Are you sure you’re alright?”
I didn’t want to bring up his mother again, so I nodded and stepped back to smile at him. “I’m good. Let’s find this room.”