“I’m sorry but I didn’t know what else to do.”
“No, Mom, you’re not sorry.That’s just it,” she said as she whirled around to face her mother once more.“You still think you somehow have the right to rule my life and tell me what to do.”
“Oh, Hadley, stop being so melodramatic.”
“Stop being soyou!”
Her mother stood and stepped into Hadley’s pacing path.Hadley almost ran into her before managing to stop with a stumble.
“Just listen to me, please,” Cheryl said.“Your children need their parents.Abby told me she cries herself to sleep every night because of the divorce, and anyone with eyes can see how devastated and uncomfortable Max is.”
“They’re coping.It’s a process and it’snormal.”
“But if you got back together, neither of them would suffer a moment more.”
“Wouldn’t they?It’s not like they can’t unlearn what they know about Kyle.Unsee the pain I failed to hide every time they mentioned the trips they took with Kyle andhis mistress.”
“I know it’s hard.”
“Do you?Looks to me like if anyone should be having this conversation with me, it should be Dad.”
Her mother flinched at the statement, and even though Hadley felt bad for inflicting pain, it couldn’t be helped.
“You’re right.I suppose this should have come from your father.So until you get a chance to speak to him privately, I’ll leave you with this: It’s possible to recover from adultery.Yes, we had several very rough, very intense years, but I swore to Jerry I’d never stray again and Ihaven’t.It is my biggest,worstregret and shame, and I’ve spent my life trying to make up for it.”
“By creating a picture-perfect life,” Hadley mused, the insight opening her eyes to a lot of the pressures Hadley had felt over the years but hadn’t understood.
“By doing the best I could do to honor your father in all the ways I hadn’t during that awful time.Hadley…I’ve known so many women who’ve fallen for men like that contractor, and they’ve sorely regretted it for one reason or another.”
Hadley blinked at the statement, at the expression on her mother’s face.“What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means exactly what it sounds like.People talk.Tell stories.Do you think you—or I—are the first women to be approached by men looking for a little fun on the side?For a step up from what they’re used to?”
“Oh, my— Youcan’tbe serious.”
“It’s a game to some of them, to see if they can score with someone normally out of reach.You’re an adult.You know what I’m saying is true.”
Hadley raced across the room once more, stood over the kitchen sink, and stared out the window, gaze drawn as it always was to the beautiful sea beyond.Yeah, she’d heard stories.Stories of mothers and pool boys, landscapers, and handymen.Rich, bored wives looking for attention because their husbands were elsewhere.But that wasn’t Bryson.It couldn’t be.“I honestly don’t know what to say to you right now.”
“Say you’ll stop seeing that man.Say you’ll give your marriage another chance.It worked for your father and me and it could work for you.”
Their affair had happened over forty years ago, when she was a baby yet to be raised.Her mother and father had had more at stake.Lived in a different time.
“Hadley, I’m aware you think I’m too critical, too judgmental.I’m sure in some ways I am, but it comes from hard experience and a lesson learned through pain.Iseeyou.In the short time you’ve been here, I’ve seen the struggle you’re having to cope, and while I know Kyle’s betrayal hurt you—”
“It didn’t.”
“What?”
“It didn’t hurt me, Mom.Itbrokeme,” Hadley corrected, interjecting the words to try—try—to get her mother to understand the depths of the pain involved.“Hurt is a missed dinner and not remembering my birthday.This is walking in to see the mistress’s ridiculously ugly shoes and underwear on our bed because I arrived home earlier than expected.Then again, I guess that’s better than seeingthemtogether in bed, but the imagery is all too easy to imagine.”
“Hadley—”
“So knowing that he broke our vows willingly,readily,” she continued, ignoring her mother, “and that he chose her over merepeatedlyeven though I loved him and trusted him?You can see why it’s a wee bit more thanhurt.We had twenty-five years together and he betrayed me, Mother.You and Dad had what?Two, from the sounds of it?Dad gambled and won.Ifwhat you’re saying is the truth and you didn’t cheat on him again.”
Cheryl’s face crumpled with tears and Hadley crossed her arms over her chest.Only her mother could pull off crying pretty at moment like this.
“Your father thought the same of me, Hadley, but he was wrong.It took time, years, but we made it.Don’t you see?You could be wrong about Kyle.And if you are, you might miss out on the best years of your life.I know I would have if your father hadn’t forgiven me.”