CHAPTER19
~ MILLIE ~
“You are totally in love with him, aren’t you?”
I groan at Ava’s question as she sits in a booth with me in the diner. If anyone in here overheard her, I’ll never hear the end of it.
“Shh,” I scold. “I still have to work here, you know.”
“Youare!” Her eyes light at that second word.
“It’s awful, isn’t it?” I glance toward the kitchen hoping Bo’s superman hearing isn’t picking up any of this. But he’s busy giving Nicholas a baking lesson, hopefully making pie crusts because we’re down to our last.
Morning and lunch were busy, as usual. But the diner is slow this afternoon, when the clouds gave way to a Tiffany-blue sky and our entire town made a beeline for the beach, right along with the man that Ava figured out I’m in love with.
I wonder how many other people have figured it out too.
“It’s not awful. It’s wonderful,” she counters.
“Even with all the worry my brother brings into your life, you still say that?”
“I worry a lot. It goes with the territory. But deep down, Millie, I know that he’ll always come home to me.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because I told him he’d be in big trouble if he didn’t.”
I laugh.
“So did you tell Dax you love him?” she asks.
“God, no. Bite your tongue.”
“Why not? I mean, I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And then toss in the fact that he mows your grass every week without being asked. Guys don’t do that unless they’re in love.”
“He’s leaving after Labor Day, and I won’t see him after that.”
“Those were your stupid rules. So break them.”
“Ava, he doesn’t want to.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean… ugh.” I groan, hating that I’m about to admit this. “I nearly told him the other day—that I’ve fallen in love with him. I really wanted to. But then he started talking about how lucky he is to not have someone waiting home for him when he deploys. How he doesn’t have to deal with the guilt or the stress of it. Can you blame him? He’s seen what I go through when Harris leaves. Whatyougo through, too, Ava. And he doesn’t want something like that hanging over his head.”
“Pfft. I don’t believe that for a second.”
“It’s exactly what he said, Ava. And it makes sense. Maybe some guys need to have all their focus on the mission.”
“Well, he’s not on a mission right now. He’s surfing. I think he can handle hearing that someone loves him. I think he’dloveto hear it.”
I shake my head. “His battalion is coming up on rotation this fall. And he keeps saying he’ll deploy somewhere. I can’t drop this bomb on him now. That wouldn’t be right.”
She frowns. “I wonder if he’ll run into Harris, wherever he’s headed.” She looks so sad, saying it. As though it stings, imagining Dax getting to see Harris at a time when she can’t.
The whole system seems unfair to me right now.
And I want to sign up for this?