And I loved it.
I couldn’t hide from the fact that no man had ever given me this much attention. Had ever granted me so much focus that was fixed on me—on me and nothing else.
He touched me like he had all the time in the world, and I loved that too.
He hadn’t even kissed me, but his fingers were touching the most intimate part of me like he was just holding my hand or something.
A whimper escaped me as a heavy fullness overtook my lower half. I writhed into him, pushing against his hold even though I didn’t want him to let go, my legs slipping and sliding against the silky sheets as I tried to accept what he was gifting me—pleasure.
The whisper of his breath in my ear was like a serenade.
The heat of him against my side was like the warmest of hugs.
And the intensity of his focus was more seductive than a kiss to my damn clit.
He gave off a sense of immovability, like he was here for an endless amount of time. Like he had nowhere else better to be.
I had no idea where this had come from. Why the tides had turned and, when I’d tried to seduce him, instead, he was doing this to me. I had no room for thoughts, no space for anything other than the ecstasy his fingers gave me.
I could feel it. Hovering in the distance. I knew what it was, and wanted it so badly. So close…so near…
A keening cry escaped me as I peaked, my orgasm flowing through me, washing me clean while calming me down. I felt like I was dragged to an incredible height all while being grounded, and there was, I realized, nothing better than that.
To fly while being tethered—I wasn’t sure I’d ever wanted anything else in my whole life.
The release and the relief tangled together, merging into one big ball of pleasure that imploded inside me, sending charges of sensation throughout my body. Kissing every limb and extremity with energy that both regenerated and relaxed.
When I sagged into the bed, when conscious thought returned to me, his fingers were tapping against my clit, and this time, as he did so, we were both aware of the difference from earlier. I was wet. So sticky wet that the noise was audible above my pounding heart. He moved, at last, so that his breath and mine mingled, and even though I couldn’t see him, I was pretty sure these were the most intimate moments of my life. More than outweighing what we’d shared together in the stables.
I wasn’t a hole.
A thing to fuck.
At least, I didn’t think so—
Before insecurities, of which I had many, could overtake me, he pressed a simple kiss to my bottom lip, dragging it down as he moved his head, swaying slightly, like he wanted to see how dormant I could be. How docile.
Did he want me to move?
Or did he want me to just lie there?
Uncertainty had my nails digging into my palms as I curled my hands, and a soft moan escaped me as the bittersweet pain from that unintended caress mingled with the delight from before.
He stiffened, but even though I thought it was impossible that he registered the sound, he did.
He knew exactly what I’d done.
“Did you do that on purpose?” he rasped, and that he sounded genuinely angry was bewildering. What did he have to be angry about?
I stuttered the truth, not even thinking to lie, which was crazy because I had no intention of not being honest. “No, it was by accident.”
“There are no accidents. No coincidences. Not in this room.” My eyes flared wide at his certainty. “You clenched your hands. Why?”
My bottom lip quivered, the one that had just felt the delicate trace of his mouth against it. “I-I didn’t know what you wanted me to do.”
“You don’t need to think with me, Camille. You just need to lie there. I’ll tell you the rest.”
Maybe, to another woman, that wouldn’t be like a sweet serenade, but to me, it was bliss. It was like a kiss from God, because I needed that. I needed to be told. I needed not to think, and I felt like, even though the circumstances weren’t ideal, even though it was probably so wrong considering his ties to my mother, maybe, just maybe, he was exactly what I needed.
A sullied savior, a life raft in a storm...