Forty-One
Conor
Ainsley McKenna.
A name I thought I’d never hear again.
A name I prayed I’d never hear again.
White noise.
I was used to living with it, used to its constant whine inside my skull but two words had amped up the volume.
Two words had destroyed a lifetime’s worth of calm.
Lodestar:**aCooooig? You there?**
Most people thought hacking involved sitting at a computer and typing really fast, mostly because that’s how Hollywood portrayed it. Jonesing off on big screens, all stacked up on top of each other, impossibly hot nerds whooping and cheering as they got the girl while never taking into account how fucking long it took to break into databases and websites and the like.
Any self-respecting hacktivist knew that wasn’t the way of it, but nobody I’d ever communicated with—and I communicated witha lot—had ever understood like Lodestar.
That was why I’d sent her candy corn.
She’d mentioned once that she liked it, so, why wouldn’t I send a couple of pounds of the stuff to her?
I figured the feeling was mutual when, a few days later, a package of Lemonheads showed up at my place. If I’d have been wearing a hat, I’d have tipped it to her. A mutual kudos—she knew where I lived, and I knew where she lived—but also, she’d remembered my candy preferences too.
Despite my appreciation for her skills, for her snark, I had no real desire to talk to her—
Lodestar:**I know you’re online.**
aCooooig:**If you know I’m online, then take a hint.**
Lodestar:**When a woman sends you her body weight in lemon candy, she deserves a morning after call.**
aCooooig:**It’s not a good time.**
Lodestar:**Why not?**
aCooooig:**Because.**
Lodestar:**You’re very communicative today. *Insert sarcasm here***
aCooooig:**That’s why I didn’t answer. I don’t want to piss you off.**
Lodestar:**...**
I frowned, wondering what the hell that was supposed to mean.
Lodestar:**You care if I’m pissed off?**
aCooooig:**Isn’t that what friends do? Care about each other?**
Lodestar:**Hmm. I suppose so. All right then, if that’s what we are... then what’s wrong?**
aCooooig:**I told you already. I don’t want to talk about it.**
Lodestar:**Means you should.**