Just to hang out, for the sake of it? With no guards questioning their location, just striving to stay afloat?
As a teenager, I’d been an envious person. I’d coveted the freedoms that I thought regular people had, but as I grew up, and as I saw the MC and the families of the brothers who were more normal than anyone I’d ever known, I realized everyone had their stresses, their strains. Nothing was ever easy.
There was just less bloodshed.
And striving to stay afloat sucked.Hard.
I curled my hands in on themselves, feeling the sting of pain and reveling in it. A shaky sigh escaped me, much like it would when a junkie took a hit and the feelings of that drug-induced ecstasy slowly started to take over everything else...
This was my crack.
My acid.
I understood why Brennan wanted me to change the way I did my nails, and oddly enough, I didn’t resent it.
He was the first person to notice.
The first person tocare.
My heart was in my throat as I registered that, but before I could get maudlin, Inessa appeared at my side.
She sported a frown that marred her perfectly made-up face as she slipped into a seat. “It’s not like you to eat through the day.”
“Is that an accusation?”
Her mouth turned down at the corners. “No. Of course not. I was just making a statement.”
I shrugged. “I’m hungry.”
“Good. You’re too thin. I can see your collarbones.”
“I can see yours,” I retorted waspishly.
“Yeah, but mine aren’t so prominent.” Her frown made another reappearance. “Are you sick or something? You’ve lost a lot of weight.”
I heaved a sigh. “Hence the sandwich. Look, I’m okay. Are you?” I asked pointedly, my gaze drifting to her stomach. It wasn’t like I could gawk at her between her legs, was it?
“The treatment’s working.”
“Glad to hear it.”
I caught sight of the server making his way toward us, and I let my focus shift to him until he placed our drinks on the table and returned to the counter, before I asked, “How’s Victoria doing?”
“She’s freaked out, and I can’t blame her.” Inessa doctored her coffee with a bottle of Stevia sweetener she pulled out of her purse, then leaned into me. “What the hell happened last night? Everything was normal as far as I could tell.”
“Nothing was ever normal in our household, was it?” I retorted dully, making a little hole in the foam so I could tip some sugar into my latte. As I stirred my drink, I murmured, “You know how everything derails, Inessa, and you can’t turn back the hands of time. I suppose that’s what happened last night.”
“Victoria says you were there.”
“Is that another accusation?” I snapped. “Are you sure they sorted out that rash? Is that why you’re so irritable today? Because I know as well as you do that you won’t be shedding a tear for that bastard. If anything, I’m grateful for what happened, and I’m pretty certain you are too.”
She pursed her lips. “Considering the circumstances, I don’t suppose there’ll be a funeral.”
I shrugged. “Off topic, but who knows?”
“I won’t be sad if there isn’t one. I’d prefer to toss dog crap on his casket than dirt.”
I grinned. “Well, that would definitely set the tone for the event.”