It had happened when Declan had called me, and again now. In theory, I felt bad. I knew keeping father and son apart was heinous, but… And it was a big but, being back here, being around these people… it was a reminder of what I’d taken us away from. If anything, I was glad Shay had had the chance to be normal.
As normal as the kid of a nomadic artist could be, at any rate.
“You feel no shame for that, do you?” he questioned roughly, his hand on the teapot turning white, making me wonder how long the china would withstand such pressure.
“I’ve not been back in your stratosphere for a week. Declan’s been shot, I had to kill a man, my home was invaded, one of your men was murdered on my street, I’ve had to move houses, and I discovered that a close personal friend is a Fed.” I gritted my teeth. “If you think I feel any shame at letting Shay avoid any of that, you’re as crazy as they say.”
He narrowed his eyes on me, but his hand released its firm pressure on the teapot, and carefully, with a care that told me he was getting himself back under control, he placed it on the counter.
“Who says I’m crazy?”
I smiled at him in earnest this time. “Anyone who’s ever met you.”
He surprised me by laughing at that. A short, sharp bark, but I had to admit, I’d thought it more likely that he’d scream at me than laugh. “Well, never let it be said you don’t speak your mind, Aela.”
“I’ve learned bullshit is futile. Cutting to the chase saves everyone a lot of time. So, feel free, Aidan, to tell me what a piece of crap I am… I’ve been waiting for it for years.” Before he could open his mouth, however, I stated, “Bear in mind that I did whatever I had to in order to protect my son, because that’s what mothers do.”
“She’s right, Aidan.”
Lena O’Donnelly.
I cut a look at the other side of the kitchen, and saw she was standing there as poised as ever. I wasn’t sure if I’d seen her be anythingbutpoised. Even during lockdown, where the women and kids were holed up in a compound for safekeeping, she was rarely rattled. She always looked like a secretary with her pearls and neat skirts, and the only bit of color on her was her hair. The only time I’d seen her dress down was when she cooked in the compound kitchen, but she always changed for dinner.
“That’s exactly what mothers do,” Lena continued as she ceased wiping her hand on a paper towel.
I looked at the door behind her and winced at the fact that the guards would keep us safe, apart from where their own people were concerned. Evidently, they’d had enough time for her to use the fucking bathroom, and only the fact that Aidan had rattled a dish had given their presence away to Shay, which had alerted me to the danger.
And to be completely frank, that was something I was about to deal with.
Call me brave, call me goddamn crazy, but I just tipped my chin up and said, “If this is going to be where Seamus and I live from now on, I will expect you to respect our privacy.”
Aidan’s eyes flashed with anger, but Lena’s features turned to ice.
“I don’t think you have any rights to respect after what you’ve done—” Aidan started to snarl.
“I protected my son. I’d do it again in a heartbeat. All the while that I kept him safe, you idiots were playing cowboys and Indians, shooting everyone up and getting into a war that, somehow, we were dragged into.
“You ever stop to wonder how aFamigliagoon knew where Seamus and I were living? You had a rat. Which put Shay and me in jeopardy. You wanted to meet your grandson so badly you sneaked into his new home. Well, good luck meeting him if he had been in a body bag because of the battles you’ve brought him into.”
Guilt merged with the rage andoutrage my declaration triggered. I truly thought Aidan was going to have an aneurysm for how bright pink his face turned, but Lena? If she’d been like ice before, she defrosted.
Tears poured down her cheeks. Her eyes were liquid with her grief.
“You feel like shit now, but how do you think I felt when I had to shove my fourteen-year-old into a safe room I only had in the first place because I knew, someday, your family would find us?” My tone was cold, but I felt it.
I felt frigid as I chose Seamus’s welfare over my own.
I tipped my chin up some more, wanting them to know that I wouldn’t take their shit.
When I was a kid, I had. I’d listened to these people, or people like them. I’d taken their stupid rules and edicts into full sway, but I wouldn’t again. I wouldn’t.
I didn’t give a shit if Declan married me, didn’t give a crap about anyone’s respect apart from Seamus’s. And the O’Donnellys needed to come to terms with that.
“Now, if you’ll see yourselves out. I’d prefer for us to meet again with Declan at my side and Seamus fully apprised of who and what you are to him.” I went to turn around, to stalk out of the kitchen and back to the living room that was blasting with cartoon sounds—I had to figure that was the teenage equivalent of ducking your head under the covers because Shay had doubled the volume on the TV—but I stopped.
Paused at Lena’s whisper.
“Are you going to take him away?”