Chapter 4
Hayden’s cock was hard as a rock, his mind whirling with the thrilling certainty that Dahlia was indeed a sub, if an untried one. He ached to lift her into his arms, his clothes magically dissolving as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Pushing her against a wall, he’d fuck her until she begged for mercy, until he couldn’t hold on another second…
She was willing—he was sure of it. He had seen it in her eyes—that intoxicating combination of erotic fear and unbridled lust that unlocked the sensual sadist in him. He had felt it in the tremble of her limbs, in the way she’d melted against him as they’d embraced, in the hard poke of her erect nipples against his chest and the sweet, breathy sighs as they kissed…
Though it took every ounce of his self-control, Hayden forced himself to pull back. This wasn’t the right time—not yet. It wouldn’t be right to take her now—not when she wasn’t yet his to claim.
He took another step back, harnessing his lust as he reminded himself of his responsibilities as an ethical Dom. Placing his arm lightly around her bare shoulders, he guided her toward the couch, indicating she should sit.
“You can get dressed now,” he said, retrieving and handing her clothing to her. He was pleased his voice sounded steadier than he felt. He fell onto the couch beside her.
She looked confused. “But…” she trailed off, her brow furrowing. “I don’t understand. I thought we’d… After that kiss… Don’t you want more? Because I do.” As she said these last words, color stained her cheeks. Looking away, she clutched the bundle of clothing to her chest.
Hayden reached out, placing his hand on her warm, bare thigh. Her skin was like silk. He had to resist the urge to slide his hand higher, to cup her cunt and to press his fingers into its yielding wetness.
Keeping his hand where it was, he said gently, “I do, too, Dahlia. Believe me, I do.” He glanced down at his still raging erection and flashed a grin, adding, “As you can see for yourself.”
She offered a tentative smile in return, but still looked confused. Her honey hair was sexily tousled around her shoulders, her color high. The look of yearning and pure lust that lingered in her eyes very nearly broke his resolve.
He pulled his hand from her thigh before he lost control. “It wouldn’t be right.” His voice came out hoarse. He cleared his throat. “You’ve just been through a very intense experience. The parameters of that session were strictly between Dom and potential sub. If I were to make love to you now, I would be taking advantage, even if it doesn’t feel that way.”
He shifted so he was facing her. “Don’t get me wrong—the man in me would love nothing better than to take you here and now. Your submissive grace during your very first exposure to D/s is breathtaking. It makes me want you all the more. But the Dom in me would be irresponsible to claim you when you’re still caught in the throes of the experience.”
He tried to think how to explain it better to someone not familiar with the scene. “It’s almost like getting a girl drunk on purpose so she’s more pliable. Even if she thinks she wants it, too, it’s just not”—he groped for the word—“gentlemanly.”
The hurt in her eyes was like a knife, poking holes in his resolve. Was he crazy not to take what this lovely girl was offering?
The tiny devil on his shoulder whispered,Who cares if she’s sub or vanilla? So what if she isn’t ready yet? She’s a beautiful, naked, willing woman. She wants it. You want it. Take what you’ve earned.
Hayden continued to teeter precariously on that razor’s edge of a Dom’s responsibility versus pure, raw desire. One push from her and he’d tumble down. God, how he longed to show her, then and there, the power and passion of a true D/s experience. Even just to take her in his arms once more—to run his fingers down her slender neck, to cup her sweet breasts, to roll her rosy nipples until they stiffened between his fingers and then to twist…
Stop it, Pierce. Get a fucking grip.
He drew in a deep breath as he again wrestled himself back under control. Lifting a metaphorical hand, he brushed the devil away.
To his relief, the pained confusion had left Dahlia’s eyes. She flopped back against the sofa cushions, grabbing a pillow as she did so and hugging it to her body. “I get it,” she said slowly. “It’s sort of the flipside to my own policy, which is never to have sex with a guy on a first date, no matter how intense the connection feels. I’ve learned from experience that once that new-person-excitement vibe has worn off, as often as not you end up wondering who the hell it is in your bed, and why you ever thought you wanted him there.”
“Ouch,” Hayden said with a pained grin.
“Oh, not you,” she said hurriedly. “I’m just saying I get it. Once I come down from this crazy high, I might end up regretting it if we move too fast.”
“Exactly,” Hayden agreed, relieved she understood. If she’d pressed any more, even the tiniest bit, he wasn’t sure he could have resisted.
He got to his feet. “It’s late, and the end of a long week. I’m actually on call tomorrow, so no telling what my schedule will be. Meanwhile, I should let you get some rest and take a little time to process the experience. Before I go, can I get you another glass of wine? A cup of tea?”
Dahlia frowned, her lower lip actually protruding slightly in an adorable pout. “Are yousureyou can’t stay?”
“I’m sure,” he said emphatically.
“Okay, okay. You’re probably right, anyway. This is definitely the more sensible choice.” She slipped her sweater over her head, its drape over her breasts nearly undoing him once more. She, too, rose from the couch and then yawned suddenly, as if it had caught her before she could stop it.
“Oh, wow,” she said with a small, tinkling laugh. “I guess I’m more wiped out than I realized.” She flashed a dazzling smile. “Thanks for a truly eye-opening experience. I can honestly say this is the mostuniquefirst date I’ve ever had.”
Hayden laughed. “I have to agree. But seriously, thank you for trusting not only me with this, but yourself. I admire your courage.”
She grinned. “I do feel pretty kick-butt awesome at the moment.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Now, get out of here before I change my mind and throwyoudown, cavewomanstyle.”
Hayden chuckled. “That’ll never happen, little girl,” he growled playfully. “If anyone does any throwing down, it’ll be me.”