Taking a step back, I pull her out of the way and close the door, quickly directing her to the waffle shop Stella’s told me about.
“Oh my God,” she moans as we step inside. “That smells insane.”
“Better than a tub of ice cream?” I ask, pulling her into a booth at the back of the café.
“Jury’s still out.”
“Ouch,” I moan, pressing a hand to my heart as if her words physically hurt me.
“The company is definitely an improvement,” she adds with a sly smile.
“I’ll take that.” Reaching for the menus, I slide one over to her, watching as she immediately looks down, her eyes widening in delight.
I have no idea if Jodie is aware of my attention, but she doesn’t look up once while she drools over the menu.
“What can I get for you both?” a waitress asks, startling me.
“Please could I get the salted caramel waffle and a luxury hot chocolate?” Jodie says happily, making a cold, dark part of me begin to warm up a little.
“Of course, and for you?”
The waitress turns to me. Her attention burns the side of my face, but I still don’t look up.
Jodie’s eyes finally turn my way, and a smile immediately pulls at my lips.
“I’ll have the same, thank you.”
In all honesty, I’ve already forgotten what she’s ordered, but we’re in a waffle shop… how bad can it get?”
The second we’re alone, Jodie starts fussing, folding the menus away and tidying up.
“Stop,” I demand, reaching over the table to grab her hand.
She immediately falls still, her eyes locked on mine.
“I’m sorry. I… I’m not really myself right now.”
“You’re perfect. Stop worrying. You’re allowed to break a bit when you lose someone you love.” I force the final few words out through clenched teeth, the weight of the real reason I’m sitting here right now knotting my stomach painfully.
“I know, I just…I’m annoying myself. I’ve got to go back to work tomorrow and…”
“You’re not ready.”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s probably what I need to drag me out of this rut, but the thought of talking to people all day long, pretending that everything is okay… It seems like hard work, and I’m not even there yet.”
“So take more time,” I suggest, not really knowing what else to say.
“I can’t. The thought of staying home longer is worse.” She drops her head into her hands and lets out a long sigh. “I’m sorry, I’m sure this isn’t what you were expecting when you ran into me.”
“It’s totally okay.” I squeeze her hand in support. “We can’t spend all our time together getting so lost in each other that we forget the world exists.”
Her eyes darken as I drag up memories from that night.
“Can’t we?” she asks hopefully.
“I mean, if you wanna go now, we can…” I start to slide from the booth. I’m joking, I think, but she doesn’t see it that way.
“No, no,” she gasps in a panic. “I’m not exactly…” She looks down at herself once more and cringes.