“Are you sure?”
Attempting to swallow down the giant lump that’s clogging my throat at the thought of what’s to come, I nod and release my vice-like grip around Stella’s body.
Taking my hand in hers, she silently leads me back toward the building.
Long before I’m ready, we’re coming to a stop beside a door where we’ve been told both my sisters are with Mum.
“It’s immediate family only,” the nurse who showed up down here says softly when we come to a stop.
My eyes lock on Stella’s, panic bubbling up inside me.
“S-she’s my fiancée. It’s—”
“Seb, it’s okay. Your sisters are in there, and I’ll be right out here. I won’t move from the window.”
Her eyes beg me not to make a big deal out of this.
Deep down, I know she’s right. She’s met Mum once—she doesn’t feel that it’s her place to be involved in this. But fuck, I want her there.
“I’ll call Theo. I’ll be right out here waiting.”
“Fuck, I—” Lifting my free hand, I drag my hair back from my brow until it hurts.
I hate this. I hate feeling so fucking vulnerable. But… I fucking need her.
‘It’s okay,’ she mouths, giving my hand a tug and dragging me into her body.
“I’m right here,” she whispers, her lips brushing mine.
“I fucking love you, Hellion,” I tell her firmly before slamming my lips down on hers in a kiss that’s totally inappropriate for the situation, but fuck if I care.
The nurse coughs and Stella pushes me back, forcing us to break apart.
“I love you too. You can do this.”
I nod once and turn my back on her. Hardest fucking thing ever.
As I push through the door, my heart feels like it’s about to shatter into a million pieces, and looking at my sisters’ tear-stained faces really doesn’t fucking help.
Glancing over my shoulder, I find Stella standing exactly where she was, although now blurred through the frosted glass of the window.
“Seb,” Sophia cries, rushing toward me and throwing her arms around my shoulders. “I’m so sorry.”
“Not your fault, Soph,” I say, my voice void of any kind of emotion.
Zoe’s arms wrap around both of us and we stand there for the longest time with the machines beeping behind us.
A knock at the door finally breaks us apart, and a doctor and two nurses slip inside the room.
“Okay?” the doctor asks softly and Sophia nods, the three of us taking a seat beside Mum’s bed.
Unable to watch, I hang my head between my shoulders while the doctor and nurses do their thing, and after only a few minutes the beeping and whooshing of machines stops.
Both Sophia and Zoe’s hands tremble in mine, but I fight everything I don’t want to be feeling.
The image of Demi laid out on the road when I found her fills my mind, and my eyes burn.
“Look after Demi, Mum,” I whisper, ripping my hands from my sisters’. “I’m sorry, I… I can’t do this.” I rush from the room, my sisters calling my name behind me, but I don’t stop.
“Seb, what—” I glance over my shoulder at Stella, and she immediately swallows her words.
Knowing that she’s not going to stop me, she nods.
‘I love you,’ she mouths before releasing me from her stare and letting me go.
It fucking pains me to do it, but I just… I can’t be around anyone right now.
“ARGH,” I scream, slamming my palms down on the wheel of my car over and over as the tears that were burning my eyes finally slip free.