CHAPTER20
LUCIA
As soon as Matthias is settled with his tablet and juice box in the back seat of the rental truck, we set off. The kid was so excited when I told him we were going on a mini vacation with Jax. He threw his arms around Jax’s neck and has had a huge smile on his face ever since. He chattered away excitedly all the way to the airport and then during the entire three-hour plane journey. He should be tired out by now but he’s still full of energy. His excitement is kind of infectious and it almost made me forget about this morning and last night
But now the feeling of dread and terror in the pit of my stomach is back. Somebody tried to kill me. If it hadn’t been for Raoul’s quick thinking, they just might have succeeded.
I glance at Matthias again and my heart aches. He’s sitting smiling at the cartoons without a care in the world, which is exactly how every four-year-old should feel, but I almost left him without a mother today and the thought of leaving him behind in this world without me is the most terrifying thing I have ever faced. I know he has family who love him. He would be taken care of by my parents, but there is no one on this earth who can love him the way that I can.
A tear runs down my cheek as I think about my own mom. She wasn’t perfect, but she tried her best. She was so worn down by her husband that she turned to pills and booze to get through the day, but I felt her love every single day she was alive. I only wish that I could have saved her. I swat the tear from my cheek before Jax sees it, but it’s too late.
His fingertips brush my cheek too.
“It’ll be okay, Luce,” he says softly. “I won’t let anyone hurt either of you.”
I turn and look at him. He is a good man. He cares for me and Matthias in his own way. I know that, but it’s not enough. It will never be enough.
“I know.” I sniff.Get a grip, Lucia!“It’s just been a weird day, that’s all. I’m fine.”
“You don’t have to pretend to be fine, Luce,” he frowns at me. “You were almost—” he doesn’t finish that sentence because of Matthias, but he doesn’t need to.
“I’m fine,” I snap at him. Being mad at him is so much easier than facing up to the truth right now. I can’t keep letting him rescue me. I can’t keep relying on him because one day he is not going to be there and it will break me. I should never have agreed to this, but it seemed like the best way to keep me and my son safe.
“We’ll be at the ranch in time for supper,” he says as he leans back in his seat.
“Okay.”
“You’ll like it there. You both will.”
“Yeah,” I mumble as I stare out of the window, wondering how long it will be before I can go home and get on with my life.
After an hour’s driving we turn down a dirt road.
“Are we there yet?” Matthias pipes up from the back seat.
“Almost, buddy,” Jax replies. “You see that huge house up ahead?”
My son leans forward, craning his neck to see out of the front window. “Yeah.”
“That’s it.”
“Wow! Did you grow up here?”
“Sure did.”
I look at the impressive house as it comes into view. It’s beautiful and the surrounding land is vast. It seems so peaceful and serene. “How do you ever leave this place?” I ask him we drive through the gates.
“I have plenty to go back to LA for,” he says with a shrug.
When the truck rolls to a stop outside the house, the screen door opens and a woman comes rushing out. She looks to be in her late-forties and has dark blonde hair tied up in a bun, tanned skin and a huge smile. Jax climbs out of the truck and she runs to him.
“Jackson,” she says, throwing her arms around him.
“Who is that, Momma?” Matthias asks.
“Let’s go find out,” I say and the two of us climb out of the truck.
As she sees us, the woman steps back from Jax and walks toward Matthias and me. “You must be Lucia and Matthias?”