Alejandro
It had beentwo days since my meeting with Carmichael and I had been on edge ever since. I had snapped at everyone around me, including Alana.
I sat in my office looking out at the L.A skyline and wondering what she was doing. She was probably in the shelter. I checked my watch and sighed. I had another two meetings to go to before I could get home to her.
I heard the office door opening behind me. I knew it would be Jax. Everyone else knocked.
‘You okay, amigo?’ he asked in his soft southern drawl as he walked into the room. I spun in my chair to face him. ‘You seem a bit wound up lately. A bit more than usual anyway,’ he said with a half-smile.
‘That meeting with Alana’s father has me rattled, Jax. He’s such a fucking snake. He makes my fucking skin crawl.’
‘So, do something about him then?’ Jax said with a shrug.
‘He’s my wife’s father! You suggesting I just make him disappear and lie to her face every day?’
‘You’ve lied to every other woman you’ve ever dated.’
‘But I’m not dating her, am I? She’s my fucking wife, Jax.’
He nodded. ‘I know. But I thought the point of marrying this chick was business. I seem to recall you swearing that this was purely a business deal, and she wouldn’t change you or your life in any way. And now…’
‘Now what?’ I scowled at him.
‘Now … you’re different, Alejandro. More considerate? And I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. But you have changed, amigo. Six months ago, you would have squashed Foster Carmichael like a bug for the way he spoke to you.’
‘You think people will start to think I’m weak?’
Jax shook his head. ‘I never said that. I think the new, slightly more mellow you, is good for business. But, these past few days, you’ve been distracted and you’ve been pissed. All I’m saying is that if this is just about Carmichael, then let’s deal with him. But is it?’
I shook my head. ‘No.’
It was true that my meeting with Alana’s father had been the catalyst for my current bad mood, but it was more than that. It was the phone call I’d overheard a few nights ago. It was that I wasn’t one hundred percent certain I could trust her. And I refused to share my bed with a woman for the rest of my life if I couldn’t share my secrets with her too.
‘I thought that it wouldn’t matter, Jax. As long as she was with me, I thought it wouldn’t matter why. But I can’t do this half-assed. I need all of her. I need to know whether this is for real or whether it’s all an act and she’s waiting for the right time to fuck me over. I keep wondering if she and her father are just waiting for the right opportunity to screw me. What if she’s a plant?’
Jax ran a hand over his jaw and shook his head. ‘I don’t know what to say, Alejandro. What does your gut tell you?’
‘My gut tells me that it’s real. The way she looks at me, Jax, I don’t deserve it. But, I know that she’s such a good actress and it might all be a big fucking act with her. She grew up with that narcissistic prick parading her in front of the cameras for every photo opportunity that could make him a quick buck or win him a few votes.’ I shook my head. ‘Besides. I’m not sure I trust my gut around her. She messes with my head, amigo.’
Jax sat back in his chair and laughed softly.
‘Just what is it about this situation that is so fucking funny to you?’ I snarled at him.
‘The invincible Alejandro Montoya, in pieces over a woman. I never thought I’d see the day,’ he laughed again.
I smiled at him as I realized he was right. There were only four people in the world who could get away with laughing at me – two of them were my parents, another one was this man here, who was like a brother to me, and the fourth person was Alana.
‘So, what the fuck am I going to do?’ I asked him with a sigh.
‘She needs to prove to you somehow that you can trust her.’
‘And how does she do that, Jax? I can’t keep testing her. If she is for real, it’s not fair. And I can’t bear the look on her face when she’s hurt.’
‘Well, that, amigo, I can’t answer for you. Only you know what she can do to prove that. And only you know if you’re prepared to do whatever that is.’
I licked my lower lip. I knew what I had to do – the trouble was, I wasn’t sure I wanted to do it. There was every chance I’d lose her if I did.
I left the hotel as soon as my last meeting had finished and drove home as fast as I could. I’d taken the papers that I needed from the safe in my office. I wondered if I’d regret what I was about to do, but I hadn’t been lying earlier in my office – I needed Alana for real.